Birmingham City News Archives

If you believe the hype, the 2007/2008 English Premier League season was the most exciting and unpredictable season that we’ve had in a long, long time.

Except for the eventual top 4. Or the top 2. Or guessing 2 out of 3 relegation contenders. Or seeing recently taken-over teams embrace mid-table mediocrity instead of European football. Or seeing solid ball-playing sides like Everton and Aston Villa end up in the top half of the table. Or seeing Mourinho leave after everyone had predicted his departure.

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Highlights from the final day of the 07/08 Premier League season:

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Saying goodbye to the football season is very much like giving birth to a ginger child: after nine months of optimism, hope and anguish, you’re left with a genuine feeling of disappointment.

The final day is often emotional. Who could forget Arsenal pipping Liverpool to the title in 1989? Well sadly, my old man. In fact, if you see a small befuddled pensioner roaming the streets, you’ll be better off avoiding football trivia altogether; senility is no picnic.

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All Premier League highlights from Saturday’s matches:

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Tubby Brazilian Ronaldo may be one of the greatest players to ever grace a football pitch, but he’s definitely a poor role model. The AC Milan man let himself down when he invited three members of the late-night entertainment industry back to a motel. It wasn’t just the fact that they turned out to be ladyboys; he shamefully offered to pay them for doing nothing. If I pay a builder to construct a conservatory, and he brings along a few superfluous tools, I’d expect him to keep his head down and finish the job.

This sorry tale was not the only case of mistaken identity this week; Rio Ferdinand kicked a female Chelsea steward after mistaking her for a wall. It sounds like a tall story, but I once kicked the wife by accident; I thought she was her mother.

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Saturday 26 April 2008 - English Premier League highlights:

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I have to admit I didn’t know much about Mauro Zarate before he joined Birmingham City on loan in January.

In truth, I didn’t know a lot more until after he announced himself to the Premiership with his second and third goals of his spell in the Blues’ 3-1 home win over Manchester City. Then I did some research.

It seems like I may not have been the only one. Manchester United assistant manager Carlos Queiroz made the short trip to Wigan Athletic last week to see their match with Birmingham City, reported as a mission to spy on the Latics’ Luis Antonio Valencia and Wilson Palacios.

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Saturday’s Premier League game highlights:

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Soccerlens welcomes odds man Gerry McDonnell for another round of playing offside, general debauchery and betting scams…although there is no evidence to suggest that Gerry McDonnell was involved in a scam, or in fact a scam actually took place, or that he’s actually paying for exclusive access to Lindsay Lohan.

I do enjoy a moral dilemma. An intellectual friend asked if I would kill a chicken to save a chicken’s life. I honestly replied that I’d happily slaughter a chicken if I missed breakfast.

He went on to ask if I would ever use inside information to profit from gambling. I once again answered in all honesty that I have never been involved in such a practice; but then again, I don’t know Harry Redknapp.

There is still uproar amongst the betting community whenever the controversial ‘next Portsmouth manager’ market is discussed. I must point out that there is no evidence to suggest that Harry Redknapp was involved in a scam, or in fact that a scam actually took place. I will just say that the 11/4 for a Newcastle win over Portsmouth should be investigated further.

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Trading in shares in Birmingham City football club was suspended on the London Stock Exchange on Thursday amid an investigation into suspected corruption, the Stock Exchange said.

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All the goals from 5-6 April 08 English Premier League games:

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The inimitable (we’re running out of adjectives) betting expert Gerry McDonnell gives his take on this weekend’s FA Cup action, Premier League action and all the other action he loves watching on the telly.

The adult film industry has many knockers, but I remain a fully-fledged supporter. My only possible critique would be that the storylines occasionally lack realism. I can’t begin to tell you how disappointed I was with my job as a photocopier repair man.

My wife is a fierce critic of the genre as she incorrectly believes that the art form demeans women. Personally, I think it’s a positive when a hobby becomes an occupation; I would love to get paid for sending nude photographs of myself to Cheryl Tweedy. I’ll have to finance my pastime by backing Portsmouth at 10/11 to beat West Brom in their FA Cup semi-final.

My favourite sub-genre of the adult entertainment industry is the one when two ladies take a spiritual road to self-discovery. There are things I’d rather not see though, and watching Barnsley play Cardiff is the equivalent of watching Lisa Riley tinker with Jade Goody. Cardiff will probably win their semi at 11/8, but I’d rather watch something a little more uplifting.

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Gerry McDonnell returns with his weekly betting column on the English Premier League.

Marriage is like a chicken vindaloo, it’s something you have to try at least once, even though you know you’ll later regret it.

I experienced my seven-year itch quite early, it was on the honeymoon. Fortunately, my wandering eye didn’t lead to an act of betrayal, although I put that down to the fact that the barmaid was almost certainly a button-flicker.

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Gerry McDonnell returns with his weekly betting column on the English Premier League.

Even though I was brought up as a Catholic, I have never followed a spiritual path. I blame an over-zealous Priest for my descent into heresy; he was constantly on my back when I was young.

If my memory serves me correctly, Easter is a time to reflect upon the resurrection of Christ. It’s believed that after three days, He rose again. I don’t want to diminish the significance, but I’d fancy Pele to beat that. The Geordies believe that King Keegan is the one true Messiah; it would be sacrilegious not to back Newcastle at 10/11 against Fulham.

Jesus may have forgiven Robbie Keane for his petulant reaction to being substituted last weekend, but Juande Ramos was apoplectic. I have a lot of sympathy for Keane in this case; it’s an emotional time when you’re being pulled off. I’ll happily play with the even money for a Tottenham win over Portsmouth.

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When Joey Barton converted a stoppage time penalty at Fulham on December 15th, Newcastle fans could have been forgiven for thinking their side may well have turned the corner.

After all, they had bounced back from a humiliating home defeat to Liverpool- one that left enduring images of angry fans yelling “You don’t know what you’re doing” at under-fire manager Sam Allardyce for pretty much the entire duration of the second half- to earn a battling point against leaders Arsenal, before following that up with a crucial 2-1 win over Birmingham at St James’ Park, and then only their second away win of the season at Craven Cottage.

Allardyce had seemingly got a message through to his players that they needed to be harder to beat- the importance of which he had stressed since arriving at the club in the summer. They sat in a comfortable mid-table position, only a decent run away from entering the race for the top six, whilst content in the knowledge that even in the event of a dramatic slide, there were “three worse teams than Newcastle” at the other end of the table. In truth there were half a dozen or more, easily.

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Gerry McDonnell returns with his weekly betting column on the English Premier League.

There’s life in the old dog…unfortunately

Like Wayne Rooney, I’m a lover of the old. I’m never happier than when some wrinkled old seaside-bungalow hogger is regaling me with tales of a bygone age.

If my old man is to be believed, and he’s not, football was completely different in the old days. Goals were celebrated by a handshake, an assault on a goalkeeper was practically encouraged and heading the ball led to a short stay in hospital, which was basically a shed with a sponge.

I’m unsure of the best way of handling the elderly when they reach such a constant state of dull reflection, but only a fool should rule out euthanasia. It looks like Avram Grant will soon be put out of his misery; Sunderland can lend a helping hand at 7/1.

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I won’t mention anything about what happened to Arsenal’s Eduardo over the weekend, since it’s been talked about plenty already, but I send my get well wishes towards him, and hope he’s back scoring goals (but not against Manchester United) again as soon as possible.

It was a pretty important weekend of football in the Premier League, with the race for the title and for European places getting ever tighter as we edge towards the home stretch.

At the other end, the relegation battle is ongoing, and though it’s almost a given that Derby will be playing Championship football next term, several other sides are fighting to not join the Rams in the second level.

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On Saturday morning, with some bookmakers, you could get odds as low as 8/11 on Arsenal regaining the Premier League title. And with their lead over Manchester United standing at five points with just twelve league games to play, some people may have argued those odds as fair.

Yet flick through the sports pages and websites today, and you won’t have to look far to find someone who is convinced that yesterday’s 2-2 draw away to 10-man Birmingham (coupled with United’s emphatic 5-1 demolition of Newcastle), proves that in fact Arsenal should not be regarded as favourites for this title. Have the bookmakers, not for the first time, got it all wrong? Or are the doom and gloom merchants gathering around the Emirates guilty off the typical sports writers’ error- over-reaction.

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In today’s football videos roundup we look a some of today’s and yesterday’s Premier League matches.

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Call me old-fashioned, but i believe that fidelity remains the cornerstone of a successful relationship. I would never cheat on my wife, unless the opportunity arose.

I have serious doubts over my wife’s respect for monogamy. The word on the street is that Ashley Cole was physically sick while performing the horizontal 64-second jig, which fits in perfectly with the wife’s M.O.

I can’t condemn Cole too strongly, as he’s not the first man to hurl after munching on a late-night kebab. On reflection, he probably should have stuck with a sausage sandwich. A Chelsea draw against Pompey ticks all the right boxes at 5/2, and then cleans them with disinfectant.

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Well, after a month filled with a few moves and a lot of speculation, we’ve finally reached the final day of the transfer window. I’ll be reporting later on all of the action from what should be a frantic day, but for now, here’s all of the latest from yesterday and the early part of today.

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It’s been a busy month with far more speculation than actual moves, but with only a few days left in the January transfer window, you can expect to see a lot of movin’, shakin’, and possibly shankin’ in the next few days.

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Fulham’s glaring need for attacking improvements was quite evident in their FA Cup shootout defeat to Bristol Rovers on Tuesday night, but Roy Hodgson may finally be getting his prayers answered. The Cottagers have signed American international striker Eddie Johnson from the Kansas City Wizards, with the 23-year old penning a three and a half year deal to be the latest American to ply his trade at Craven Cottage.

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It’s the weekend, but I’m not taking any time off from keeping you updated with the latest transfer news.

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It’s Friday, so I know that you who are reading Socc