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In this week’s WagSnatch roundup: another Ronaldo orgy (so he has fun, when will people stop complaining about their excess of hypocritical virtues?), Kaka linked with a corrupt church (does Jesus take kickbacks?), Jermain Defoe’s ex sheds light on their relationship (and sheds her clothes in the process), we find out why Jermaine Pennant is so messed up, Kickette interviews Francesco Toldo (Inter Milan) but sticks to balls and fashion and Fabio Capello is being investigated for tax evasion (will the FA have to fire him before he even manages one game?).

Game? Come on in…

1. Cristiano Ronaldo’s Romp in Rome

Here’s the fun bit – there’s no ‘evidence’ that Cristiano Ronaldo has done anything here – but that doesn’t stop us from raising this issue again. Mind you that this is all hearsay, and loathe as I am to publish it I think it illustrates something important.

The short version – he jets off to Rome to meet a friend, and as the evening turns to night, they visit a strip club and then ‘reportedly’ his friend brings back two ‘waitresses’ to their hotel. Two hours later the waitresses are gone and the story, sold to News Of The World, is making headlines.

No photos of Ronaldo at the spot, no interviews from the hookers (actually, all they say is ‘Ronaldo’, so it could just as easily have been the fat one, which would make much more sense geographically).

In any case, regardless of whether he’s banging prostitutes or not, why is this played as the ‘immorality card’? I mean, they could just as well have done more research and created a story about the lavish spending of football stars on whores, but they took the easy option of slamming Ronaldo’s morals (or lack thereof) while painting themselves as holier-than-thou (read the last few paragraphs of the NOTW piece).

Pfff…anyway, I call bullshit on this one, mainly because most of the story seems like it’s pulled off the reporter’s ass (sort of like when Neil Custis (The Sun) or Daniel Taylor (Guardian) write their ‘insightful’ columns only to have their insights proven completely wrong the next day).

There was one good thing out of this article though – a bunch of photos. Links at the end

2. Kaka’s church leaders take bribes

Not exactly Kaka’s church (it’s Jesus’s church, after all) but the church that he gives annual donations to. The leaders pleaded guilty to money laundering and the Brazilian police has sent Kaka a few questions about his relationship with those leaders (news source).

Nothing much out of this one, I’m afraid. Kaka is squeaky clean (although it would be fun if he had knowingly helped criminals) and a media darling. It helps that he’s a great player too

3. Charlotte Mears bares all

She’s a sly one, that Charlotte. First she mooches off on all of Jermain Defoe’s money (or as much as possible). Then, when he dumps her for Danielle Lloyd (you must have something seriously wrong with you to be dumped for DL), she blows his money to buy new boobs, goes back to stripping for lingerie magazines and bitching about how bad things are.

Not one to pass judgment but it’s sad how the immorality of CM is ignored for the sake of painting Defoe as the typical immoral footballing star.

Again, pictures at the end of the article.

4. Jermaine Pennant’s Dad Is a Druggie?

Sticking with NOTW, I must admit that what they lack in class and decency, they make up for it in their investigative talents. Consider their undercover investigation of Jermaine Pennant’s father’s ‘crack den’. According to this report, Pennant Sr sells drugs to make a living.

We should be careful with stuff like this (I can imagine opposition fans preparing their chants for the next Liverpool game right now) – while a tough childhood is no excuse for being an asshole, it does answer for how people turn out when they are given a lot of money at a very young age. Anger management and discipline issues have hounded several young English stars (Barton and Pennant being two obvious examples) and as the FA prepares to invest more in youth training perhaps they can talk to off-field counseling and support as well?

At the end of the day, J Pennant at the very least deserves some privacy. No matter how dark your family secrets, should all the dirty laundry really be aired in public?

5. Kickette interviews Francesco Toldo

Congratulations to V from Kickette for landing Inter Milan’s Francesco Toldo for an impromptu interview at a fashion gala in Milan.

Best bit from the interview (while talking about David Beckham’s Emporio Armani ad):

K: His balls look overwhelming in the photograph – do all soccer players have big nuts?

FT: “Yes we do. We all have enormous balls” (laughs).

Kudos for the chops to ask that question.

6. Fabio Capello investigated for tax evasion

Reports from Italy suggest that Italian authorities have opened investigations into possible undeclared earnings.

FA statement on the matter:

“It is our understanding that the Italian tax authorities are currently following a procedure of looking into the finances of numerous high profile individuals – particularly in sport. We have spoken to Fabio and his advisors about today’s newspaper report in Italy and they have explained the facts. They have also given us their assurance that Fabio’s tax payments are in order.”

7. Links

Links to the photos discussed in the article:

Tottenham WAGs
Charlotte Mears lingerie shoot
Charlotte Mears
WAG 2
WAG 3
WAG 4

The WagSnatch column will (hopefully) return every Thursday with a look at the top non-football football stories of the week.