The Communist Republic of Arsene Wenger
For a manager who rarely witnesses the on-pitch misdemeanours of his own team, Arsene Wenger is never short of views on football’s bigger picture. Comrade Wenger has used his weekend off to good effect by bemoaning the break-up of communist countries into smaller states, and particularly its impact on international football.
Overlooking the various conflicts currently taking lives in these regions, Wenger said: “I’m not a big fan of international football as they destroyed it. Take Russia – once it was one country, now it’s 21. Yugoslavia was one and now is six.” In Russia’s defence, it does currently seem to be making attempts to cut Uefa’s quota of footballing nations by getting one or two of its former constituents back on-board.
As if a barely concealed campaign for the reformation of the Soviet Union was not controversial enough, Wenger then launched a vicious Maxist attack on international football’s bourgeoisie elite. He continued: “Ryan Giggs never played in a World Cup. If Maradona was born in Luxembourg he would never have played in a World Cup – but he still would have been the best player in the world. In club football you get to put the best players in the world together – that is justice.”
Ryan Giggs barely played in an international match at all, never mind a World Cup, but that was more to do with Sir Alex Ferguson’s dictatorial shackles than anything else. And Maradona won the 1986 competition single-handedly (literally), so there is no reason to assume he could not have at least got Luxembourg through the qualifying stages.
Although his argument seems a little flawed on closer examination, it is very noble of Monsieur Wenger to have signed Arsenal players from those footballing backwaters of Togo, Ivory Coast and erm, Wales to further their football experiences and give them opportunities they may not have got in their native lands.
In all seriousness, Aaron Ramsey is the only member of Arsenal’s first-team squad whose nation has not qualified for at least one of the last two World Cups. The Arsenal squad has a distinct lack of Luxembourgers, a scarcity of San Marinans and an absence of Andorrans. So much for Wenger’s hard done by big fish in the small pond.
So perhaps Wenger is employing that most communist of tactics, the double bluff. Could it be that the demise of international football might actually benefit his ethnically diverse bunch of World Cup qualifiers? The thought of Cesc Fabregas with his feet up all summer must have the Arsenal boss glowing like Chernobyl.
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what the fuck is this meant to be?
yea, are u going to provoke us ??? if u don’t anything just shut up n let wenger do his job. i love this club in good or bad condition.
Ironic name to call AW, since on the other hand Wenger has called for clubs to function by their own means rather than relying on debt and the welfare of sugar daddy owners to buy their success. Funny you should call the manager of one of the only financially successful, profitable clubs in the world a communist…another idiotic attempt at character assasination. You would make a good republican if you lived here in the USA.
Only a right wing moron (as they all are) could have thought this was hilarious enough to print. If Arsene is a Socialist then im even more proud of him.
As for Maradona playing for Luxenbourg and getting them through…with that statement you condemn your whole piece to ridicule. Luxenbourg would not qualify with 5 Mardonas unless they all cheat….?
What ever rg you normally write for (possibly the Torygraph?) go back and grow up!
Wenger had Hleb who never went to a world cup. clearly, most of the worlds best players play for the worlds strongest (and usually largest) nations but its not always the case.
Domestic football is equally as bad, where average mid table clubs without a history of winning anything can suddenly be thrust to the top of the table (chelsea, Man City possibily), just because their arab is richer than anyone else’s. That’s not sport.
Glad to see irony has yet to be reach some parts of the UK and elsewhere!
It’s not irony you retard it’s just not funny. Suggest you go back to the dictionary and deliberate on what the term “comedy” actually means, and look up “irony” while you’re there. Numpty
Ian - “An expression or utterance marked by a deliberate contrast between apparent and intended meaning.”
can someone explain what’s so terrible about this piece?
the author exhaggerates with his wording in an attempt to be funny. if you don’t find it funny, fine, but i don’t see what’s such a big deal. are people getting this worked up because he calls wenger a communistin a joking, exhaggerating sort of way? since when is being a communist even an inherently bad thing?
either i’m missing something or almost everyone else is. would be good if someone explained what’s so bad rather than just insulting the author though.
The greatest insult to an economics major is to call them a communist.
But what else can you expect of someone who has to stoop to such thinly veiled insults, the article is highly humourous, it’s a complete joke, but by the end of it you’re left thinking that the author really doesn’t like Wenger and that he’s just attempting to make others smirk at him.
Sarcasm is the lowest form of whit as proven by a writer driven to hyperbole and exaggeration to get a cheap laugh.
The author has a wild imagination, if only it were true so critcism could be so easy!
That quote about Maradona being able to lead Luxembourg through to the qualifying stages is laughable at best.
George Best couldn’t do it with Northern Ireland either.
This is probably the most badly-thought out article I’ve ever read. He’s not talking about the political ins-and-outs, he’s saying that the international game has suffered as a by-product of the emergence of young nations who have a right to compete. That’s not mind-games, that’s a fact. He’s not blaming them for their emancipation, he’s merely saying the standard has dropped, which it has.
The comments about Maradona and Giggs are also spot on. It’s not a double-bluff either because that statement is not gonna change the landscape of international football. He’s just evaluating the structure of the game today.
just an over-exaggeration of small comments from wenger..
It is good to have my views on the State of the capitalist west (or at least the Capitalist West London) represented so coherently and accurately. At least in France, we still have a communist party.
top quality article that is very funny. your criticisms are pathetic and only about two of you seem to actually understand what irony is. keep writing you’ve got a natural talent.
by “your” i meant the comments not anything to do with your article which is top notch.
I do see bits of humour/irony/sarcasm/pathetic attempts to be funny. Still the article is retarded…………….