Listen to this week’s Soccerlens Podcast, where Adrian Clarke and Iain Spragg discuss Liverpool’s problems in detail, preview the Liverpool v United game and also talk about why Rafa Benitez is safe in his job regardless of results in the next couple of games [podcast link].

Ian McParland and Gareth Southgate’s sackings have surprised people in recent weeks, although for both managers the tell-tale signs were there from the start of the season. McParland would have had to go if Notts County didn’t achieve a rip-roaring start to their campaign (and they didnt) while Southgate, having taken Middlesbrough down, was keeping the seat warm and the ship stable until Gibson found a manager capable of taking the team back up at the first time of asking (which he has in Strachan).

It might seem easy to be wise ‘after’ the fact, but for both managers the signs were there.

Now we’ve already seen 13 sackings in the Football League this season, 5 of them in October, while in continental Europe 4-5 Serie A clubs have sacked their managers since the start of this season. Managing is a tough job (especially since you’re accountable for misfiring players rather than the misfiring players themselves) and in times of financial uncertainty you’re likely to find chairmen and owners more and more ruthless in their approach to hiring and firing managers.

And while there are some clubs who just can’t seem to hire a decent manager to replace the ones that left last season (Portsmouth and Newcastle), there are others who look set NOT to fire their manager despite a string of bad results.

Rafael Benitez (where else did you think this was going?) has been priced at ridiculously low odds – with some bookies picking him as the second favourite to get the sack next.

There was a time when Rafa’s position was considered tenuous – especially two seasons ago when the Liverpool owners were in talks with Jurgen Klinsmann to have him replace Benitez. The last three seasons – the Champions League final appearance in 06/07, the strong league showings of 07/08 and 08/09 – have helped build up a tremendous amount of goodwill for the Liverpool manager amongst the fans, and at the start of this season the couldn’t have been in a stronger position unless he had actually won a title.

4 consecutive defeats, 6 in 13 and now everyone has their knives out and sharpened, including the fans who are as sick of the negative reporting in the press as they are of Rafa Benitez refusing to change his tactics to suit the situation (and his players).

To be fair to Rafa, his stubbornness is not dissimilar to that of Arsene Wenger, who, upon deciding that his team are going to play a specific way and everything else be damned, has stuck to his guns through thick and thin (and look where that’s gotten him). Rafa doesn’t have league titles to boast of at Liverpool, and he doesn’t have the lifelong support of the board either – crucial factors in Wenger’s ability to ‘do his thing’ at Arsenal without facing the intense criticism that Rafa is facing.

But to think that Rafa is close to being sacked in nonsense. Hicks and Gillett are seasoned campaigners and they know that stability at the club, coupled with closing ranks in the face of adversity, is the best way to pull Liverpool out of this slump. The only way the owners make money here is by selling the club, and to do that they need Liverpool to be a stable environment with good performances on the pitch. Firing Rafa, especially so far away from the transfer window, makes no sense.

So expect Rafa to stay on, at least till December, and then re-evaluate the situation. There are several variables – is the club close to being sold, is there a suitable replacement available (certainly not Klinsmann and not after Bayern), and can Hicks and Gillett secure enough funds for the new (or current, if Rafa stays) manager to reinforce the squad.

Rafa Benitez has tried his best to stay out of trouble in the last two weeks, refusing to criticise the referee at the Sunderland-Liverpool game (even though Rafa has made several comments on referees in the past when things go against Liverpool) and he refused to ask for a re-match. Nothing to upset the cart, nothing to mark his territory. The performances on the pitch just aren’t matching up, and Rafa knows this.

I wonder if Hicks and Gillett are backing Rafa not just to present a united front and give an air of stability to the club but to also gain leverage over the manager come transfer window time. Rafa played a pivotal role in having Rick Parry leave the club last season (so that Rafa could have more control over signings) and while we’ve just had one summer to judge, there hasn’t been much difference or improvement.

Perhaps the owners can get their way and exert some control over Rafa in winter, and bring in resources where they are most needed?

Although by then, with Aquilani expected to settle in and Gerrard / Torres hopefully fit, Liverpool could be back to their bullish ways of last season (you don’t forget thrashing Real Madrid and Manchester United that convincingly in a hurry) and Rafa can afford to look back, laugh, and maybe even start on another list of ‘facts’.

Tune in for Episode 25 of the world famous Soccerlens Podcast with ex-footballer Adrian Clarke and football journalist Iain Spragg.

This week’s humdinger of a show features a fascinating interview on all things Manchester United and Barcelona with respected football writer and author of new book “Glory, Glory! Man Utd in the 90s – The Players’ Stories” Andy Mitten as he talks about the difference between football fans in Barcelona and Manchester, Manchester United’s title aspirations and of course, gives the listeners an insight into “Glory Glory”, which is based on detailed interviews with many of United’s players from the star-studded 90s about life behind the scenes at the club.

There’s all the usual knockabout chat as well from the duo who this week focus their attention on the future of Rafa Benitez, October’s sacking frenzy, all the usual match previews (including West Ham v Arsenal and Liverpool v Manchester United) and the answer to a tricky reader’s email question.

Make sure you send in your feedback and questions through podcast@soccerlens.com and Clarke and Spragg will feature the best of them in next week’s show.

You can listen to this week’s episode below:
Download link (mp3, 29mb, 32 mins)

It was the best of times, it is the worst of times now for Liverpool fans – of that there can be no doubt. Looking back briefly to last season when Rafa Benitez’s side lead Manchester United in the Premier League by nearly double digits, this was going to be the year that finally ended Liverpool fans long wait for the biggest domestic prize.

But alas one ‘fact’ related rant later and a few shaky results left Liverpool finishing second to United even after an impressive string of results to round off the season. I noticed a shift in mood from Liverpool fans over the second half of that campaign, one that began with winning the league was expected as a minimum requirement from such a strong position, too finishing second is ok because next year we’ll do it…

In taking a step back to look at the situation objectively, the reign of Rafa Benitez can almost be defined by the caption ‘next year we’ll be champions’. This is not to say that over the last five years Rafa has not won trophies, not least of which the dramatic Champions League comeback against Milan, but that was some time ago now. In hindsight that win has been Rafa’s saving grace as I’m convinced had Milan done what the laws of physics would suggest from a ‘three goals to the good’ position at half time; Liverpool would have a different manager today.

Liverpool fans have gone through the emotional rollercoaster of believing last term that the league title was truly in sight, only then to lose out to bitter rivals United. It was then expected that the side would kick on and go one better this term finishing top of the Premier League; on the basis of what we have seen from Liverpool so far this season – not so much.

I do not need to reel off the facts, but Liverpool have started dreadfully this campaign, seven wins and six losses is hardly the form of potential champions let alone a side with realistic ambitions of qualifying for the Champion’s League next term. In short Liverpool now enter a three to five game series that may well prove to shape the future of the club as we now know it. This may at first sound melodramatic but a loss to Man United at the weekend and failure to qualify out of the group stages in the Champions League would surely have to lead to a change of manager.

Going one step further this could also have potential ramifications for the financial stability and ownership structure of the club. The Premier League is more competitive this year than ever, and to think Liverpool may have lost five games before the end of October has to leave doubts as to their ability to retain a top four finish. With Man United and Chelsea dead certs to finish in two of the Champions League slots, that leaves Arsenal, Liverpool, City, Tottenham and even Villa to battle for the final two. From a Teesside perspective it does not bear thinking about. The financial implications again could be crippling for a club that has cash flow issues and board squabbles to deal with as it is.

The final element to this equation lies in the UEFA seeding list coefficient. Next time around Liverpool’s Champions League win comes off the coefficient calculation, and if this was to be replaced with a ‘did not get out of the group phase’, followed by a Europa League campaign, Liverpool’s status as a number one seed would also be at risk.

Although Liverpool aren’t in a good spot, it’s not the end of the world for the team today and they can still influence what happens tomorrow, but there can be no denying that there is an element of peering over the abyss to the current predicament. Things can and will go one of two ways, for Liverpool’s sake I hope Gerrard and Torres develop some super human powers of recovery and endurance or it could be all change in the red half of the city come January.

“Seeing these smiling faces is the greatest pleasure. They have been magnificent all season. They have been our 12th man. I have always said our fans are the best in England. Now I know they are the best in Europe too.” (Rafa Benitez)

Yes indeed, Rafa Benitez may be many things but naiive he most definitely is not! The moment he walked through the hallowed gates of Anfield on the 16th of June 2004 he was met by that enormous weight of expectation and it has rested heavily on his shoulders ever since.

But Rafa knew what he was getting into, he relished the challenge…..and quick smart produced a five year plan. The man arrived with credentials and the belief that he was the one who could achieve what Souness, Evans and Houllier failed to do in the previous 14 years…..bring the title back to Anfield.

Five years into that five year plan and Rafa has yet to deliver the one prize the Kop so desperately covet and the relationship between fans and manager has become a simple equation.

However, before examining where Benitez stands in the hearts and minds of Liverpool fans we should first look at the history….what sets the tone amongst Liverpool fans and how they treat their managers, in the context of their huge desire to return to the glory days of the 70’s and 80’s.

As one who has been around since the Shankly days, that’s not a big ask. I can’t think of another club where the fans are so completely supportive of their managers, where they stand cheek to jowl in their defence and where they show outstanding patience, an acceptance that everyone deserves a chance…. time to prove themselves, despite their hunger for success. If anything you could argue that Liverpool fans give their managers too much rope and in recent history they have all ultimately hung themselves. Arguably, Souness, Evans and Houllier had all passed their sell-by date before the axe finally fell.

But in the final analysis there’s no scope whatsoever for a failed manager at Anfield offering a case of fan impatience as the cause of his demise. Maybe that’s because of the halcyon days…that unique dynasty created by the wonderfully charismatic legend that was Shankly. The ‘Boot Room’ delivered Paisley and Fagan in the great man’s wake and between them they made Liverpool a world force. They set the standards and for two generations Liverpool fans knew nothing but success. Those days are not long past and have set the agenda for all that has followed.

The baton has now long since been passed to Rafa by one in a lengthening line of plodders, whilst the gold medal sprinters of former days remain but a fond memory. Shankly to Paisley to Fagan to Dalglish was undoubtedly the ‘dream team’…..leaving all others in their wake as they won gold medal after gold medal. To be followed by Souness to Evans to Houllier to Benitez, so far, has been the equivalent of replacing Usain Bolt with…..well let’s say….someone else.

So how does Rafa stack-up in that ‘lesser’ team? Not badly at all actually. Souness won the FA Cup in 1992, Evans the League Cup in 1995 and Houllier 2 League Cups, 1 FA Cup and 1 UEFA Cup (3 of the 4 all coming in the same season). Benitez has 1 FA Cup and the (potentially) job saving prize of the CL in his first season…and that trumps all of the others!

The question remains though, where would Benitez be now if it wasn’t for that miraculous comeback in Istanbul? But the fact is that he won it and his stock rose hugely as a result, understandably so. Benitez won his two trophies in his first two seasons at Liverpool, both cups; both in penalty shoot-outs; and both because of the inspirational Stephen Gerrard. It is often said that Gerrard single handedly won those trophies…and I can’t find fault with that argument.

Is it a valid point to suggest that if Rafa had lost those two penalty shoot-outs, or if he had lost Stevie G to Chelsea some seasons back, that he would now be a distant memory on the Kop….or is that too harsh?

But let’s examine Rafa’s current position at Liverpool and what the future might hold….five years into his tenure.

Let me begin where I began, with that quote from Rafa. There’s no question that he has understood from day one the importance of keeping the fans onside. I would argue that he plays them like a fiddle ….and he’s clearly a man with an ear for music! Let me go through some examples. Yes, I accept that Liverpool fans may not agree with these observations but as a distant observer maybe I can bring a different perspective.

When the US owners arrived in 2007 all looked rosy…for about 5 minutes. Rafa had money to spend and the arrival of Torres and Babel, amongst others, had Anfield buzzing and off to a good start to the season. But trouble arrived in October, points were dropped and Benitez came under fire for his rotation policy (probably unfairly), primarily concerning Gerrard and Torres. It was at this point that Rafa went public with a high profile attack on the owners….apparently because further transfer funds would not be forthcoming in January.

No need to rake over old ground…. suffice to ask why he went public on an ‘internal’ matter and why the timing (just 3 months after spending close to 50 million and declaring himself well satisfied with his summers work)? The answer may lie in what happened when Liverpool’s title challenge collapsed by January. The bitter disappointment brought a wave of emotion from the fans and the owners took the brunt of their anger as they rallied in support of their manager. Rafa had played his card to perfection and with impeccable timing! It was premeditated damage limitation at its best!

Fast forward to last season and we found Benitez leading a full-on title charge. With his team leading the way into the New Year, Rafa’s stock was flying high. In that early part of the season he steered clear of controversy….basking in the warmth of expectation and belief.

But come January and storm clouds started to gather. As their bitter rivals put together 11 straight wins, Liverpool’s challenge hit a rock in the shape of too many ‘soft’ draws and when they lost 2-0 at Boro on the 28th of February, leaving United 7 points clear, the title race was declared over by most observers. The fans had become increasingly restless over those two months. It was a bitter pill to swallow but once again Rafa had his hand on the pulse. He was dealing cards faster than a Las Vegas croupier as he desperately tried to deflect attention elsewhere and hang onto the fans loyalty.

Firstly, we had the now infamous ‘Rafa Rant’, quickly followed by an attack on David Gill over his role with the FA. Then it was back to internal matters and his own contract. He went public (yet again on an ‘internal’ issue) with a cryptic reference to his control (or lack of) over transfers. Barely a week after dropping this tidbit to the fans he then declared that it was inappropriate to talk about his contract publicly as it was a distraction from the real business at hand. Hmmm….

Next came the barb directed at Parry as the internal wrangling heated up. Apparently it was Parry’s fault that Daniel Agger was threatening to leave because Parry had been way too slow in coming-up with a new contract. Once again you may ask, why wash the dirty linen in public? Agger’s agent weighed in, stating that is was nothing to do with the timing of a new contract that had his client restless but the fact that he was unhappy at not playing…..clearly a player/manager issue….and one that Benitez should have been aware of and should have been handling (and maybe he was aware of it but that didn’t suit his needs?).

In all the above instances the fans supported Rafa 100%. My point has nothing to do with the specifics of these episodes…all of which were debated to death at the time. No, I am interested in the timing; the correlation with what was happening on the pitch and Benitez’ penchant for deflection when the heat is on. In particular, I wonder at his tactic of making private club matters public for personal gain, invariably involving his determination to influence the fans and get them onside.

But the most interesting aspect of all of the above, in the context of the subject of the article, is that Rafa came-up short this time. When Liverpool lost to Boro the majority of fans felt the title was going back to Old Trafford. It was yet another gut wrenching disappointment and emotions ran high. For a number of days the fans poured their hearts out and the verdict was not good for Benitez. His team selection for the Boro game was crucified and old issues regarding rotation, tactics and ability in the transfer market came under the spotlight.

There is no question in my mind that in those brief few days Rafa lost the majority support of the fans. Some journalists suggested that a bad result against Real Madrid in the CL would see his departure.

Now there’s an old adage about lucky managers but I can’t quite recall how it goes. What happened next for Rafa was maybe down to luck or maybe his guardian angel was on hand. Like a fading gambler desperately seeking one last ‘big hand’ Benitez was dealt a royal flush….by his team. Timing has been everything for Rafa recently and as he hung by a thread after that Boro game his team suddenly found a purple patch, unprecedented in his tenure…and one that, I believe, saved his skin.

Real Madrid were embarrassed at Anfield, Villa dispatched 5-0….but the jewel in the crown was a 4-1 away win over United. As Liverpool soared United wobbled….and the title race was back on! Liverpool’s run came to an ignominious end in the CL QF against Chelsea but a strong finish in the league and pushing United to the 2nd last game restored Rafa’s credibility.

Ultimately, Liverpool fans felt they were unlucky and when Ronaldo’s departure from OT was announced in June they were positively dancing in the streets! The title was there for the taking this season! But as a rather bizarre transfer window closed, many had revised their expectations. Their shopping list of a quality full-back, wide player and striker (which would provide the necessary depth to finally reach the ultimate objective) never materialized. The quality full-back arrived as another ‘decent’ one departed but the big hit was the departure of, arguably, their most influential player last season…Alonso.

Maybe not in the same league as Gerrard and Torres, Alonso was the fulcrum of the system that proved so successful last year (and a system for which Rafa must take full credit!) and in Aquilani they have bought a good player but one who is injury prone and cannot perform the same role as Alonso. Many point the finger at Rafa for his departure after the ‘Barry affair’ last year and his revelation that Alonso would be sold.

But in some ways Rafa has gotten lucky again! The expectations have been revised downwards as a result but make no mistake, the desire and ambition will burn forever and Rafa is now living on borrowed time. History alone shows that six years without the title at Anfield puts you at risk. It quickly becomes a set of extremely polarised possibilities!

For the man who delivered the CL in his first season (dreamtime for most managers) these are the potential scenarios:

Win the title this season and you probably have a job for life.

Come up short and fall out of the race too early, especially if Utd are well ahead of you, and your number is likely to be called.

My feeling at this point is that the Liverpool fans can’t take another slap in the face in the Rafa era and no amount of attempted deflection will save him from here on in. If he doesn’t deliver the ultimate prize he may go this season but that will very much depend on how things unfold. Failure to deliver this season and next (assuming another CL isn’t won) and I believe that the fans will call time. And, as always, Liverpool’s results and league position in relation to their bitter rivals will also play a part.

As I said, the relationship is a simple equation and the Liverpool fans have delivered everything and more that could be expected from their side. It will be their call. Benitez has managed the ‘politics’ to such an extent that he has been nearly untouchable, despite major fall-outs with the owners and senior management at the club….and make no mistake…that’s because he has always understood that, at Anfield, it is the fans who decide on managerial moves.

He couldn’t have asked for more from them. He knew the expectations. He had a plan. It’s now time to deliver!

The fans continue to hang in there but if the cool optimism of early season turns into major disappointment as the season unfolds, emotions will once again run high and as we’ve seen time and time again, when the tide turns for managers it usually happens in the blink of an eye.

After the last two seasons I doubt that the Anfield faithful can take many more hits. There’s a limit to every managerial tenure, no matter how much loyalty the fans show. Rafa has played the ‘owners’ card and the ‘hierarchy’ card (in both cases to perfection) but the next time the fans are left gutted I expect they will look at just one man.

Benitez’ resume as a manger stands up to scrutiny against the best. He’s certainly not a bad manager and is a decent individual. Credit has to go to anybody who can operate effectively under such pressure for a sustained period.

Maybe he will take his team to the Promised Land this season and become Liverpool Royalty for life.

If not, the clock will continue to tick….and when it comes…the end will be swift.

Dirk Kuyt’s first half effort handed Liverpool an unconvincing 1 – 0 win over battling Debrecen at Anfield.

Boss Rafa Benitez, celebrating his 300th game in charge of Liverpool, named an unchanged side to the one that beat Burnley 4 – 0 on Saturday – but it was the Hungarian champions that came closest to taking a shock lead, Peter Czvitkovics testing Pepe Reina with a stinging drive. Reina then held a Laszlo Bodnar free-kick as the visitors enjoyed a good spell of pressure.

The outstanding Albert Riera twice came close to breaking the deadlock for Liverpool, first dragging a shot wide before being denied by Debrecen keeper Vukasin Poleksic. However, Kuyt finally broke the visitors stubborn resistance on the stroke of half time, scoring from close range after Poleksic could only parry Fernando Torres’ first effort into his path.

The second half began the same way as the first, with the home side frustrated by Debrecen’s resolute defending, but they came tantalisingly close to a second through Steven Gerrard’s sublime volley. Yossi Benayoun then saw his effort saved by Poleksic after a mazy run, before the impressive Adamo Coulibaly came close to giving the visitors an unlikely point – but could only shoot tamely at Reina when clean through.

Debrecen, whose last visit to England ended in a 3 – 0 defeat to Manchester United, continued to pose a threat to the Reds in the closing stages – but Liverpool held on to record their 100th European win and begin their Champions League campaign with victory.

It’s one of the most tiresome cliches in football these days, yet one that most in the public eye can unilaterally agree on. Liverpool, they say, are a team of two players. No argument. G&T, Stevie & Nando, Gerrard & Torres.

Like the zonal marking debate, no conversation about Liverpool is complete without it. But yesterday’s annihilation of Owen Coyle’s much-liked Burnley side in the Anfield sunshine, whilst hardly unexpected or especially flamboyant, did at least show the world that there is more to Liverpool’s attacking armoury than their prize duo.

Rafael Benítez has been given a few headaches from his supporting cast in the past few weeks, Ryan Babel’s lethargy and fondness for an inflammatory quote or two may well have led to his omission from the squad yesterday, whilst Albert Riera was another to go public on his frustration at a lack of minutes so far this season.

But if Benítez had any problems with those two, with yesterday’s match-winners he can have no issue whatsoever. Dirk Kuyt, and hat-trick hero Yossi Benayoun are fast establishing themselves as two of the Reds’ most reliable performers, shaking off the inconsistency and quality issues that some commentators – including yours truly – believed would forever hold them back.

The pair have now chipped in with more than fifty goals in their two-and-a-bit seasons together at Anfield, no mean feat at all considering Benayoun has not always been (and probably still isn’t) an automatic choice, and that Kuyt was initially signed as a central striker, who has since shown off his admirable versatility to retain an integral role.

The Dutchman, deployed centrally behind Fernando Torres, excelled in his hour or so on the pitch yesterday, setting the tone in a quiet first fifteen minutes with his tireless running and willingness to knit midfield and attack together. And once his Israeli team-mate had opened the scoring with a well-crafted turn and finish, Burnley were swept away.

Benayoun was phenomenal, few players in the league today possess as adhesive a touch as the 29 year-old, and Benítez himself paid tribute to his “clever movement” in his post match press conference. He richly deserved his treble here, and was only denied a fourth by a dubious – nee incorrect – offside decision after Steven Gerrard’s free kick had been spilled into his path by Brian Jensen.

Kuyt had already gobbled up a similar rebound for the critical second goal before half time, as Burnley’s keeper gave Benayoun’s 25 yarder the hot potato treatment following a lightning counter attack. Benayoun would later go on to complete his hat trick with a pair of simple but effective finishes in front of an appreciative Kop End.

It all bodes well for Liverpool, who saw their skipper Gerrard enjoy a wonderful game of his own from a deeper central midfield position, whilst Benítez was gushing with praise for young Brazilian Lucas, who shrugged off the effects of a gruelling international week with Brazil to turn in a performance good enough for his manager to label him “our key player today”.

And whilst a solid and healthy victory over Burnley is not exactly pulse-racing fare, and despite important away wins for Chelsea & Manchester United, Benítez has reason to be cheerful as he surveys the league table today. His side may have suffered the same number of losses already this season as they managed in the whole of the last campaign, but the Spaniard knows that his squad is improving by the day.

Torres here was largely anonymous, yet the side still managed four goals – and could have had plenty more – whilst Gerrard proved that he can still be hugely effective in an orthodox midfield role, whilst the consistency of the likes of Pepe Reina, Glen Johnson, Emiliano Insúa & Jamie Carragher is rarely an issue.

They might not, as Reina revealed in yesterday’s Guardian, be overly-confident of a title push this season, but one thing is for sure, the best of Liverpool this season is still to come, and they have more than Gerrard & Torres to frighten teams with.

Tuesdays have never been so exciting. Even the institution that is the UEFA Champions League and the subsequent “Champions Tuesdays” fanfare it precipitated hasn’t managed to turn a day of boredom and wistful gazing towards weekends past and future into anything more than a filler day.

Seasoned office conversationalists agree on very little- the Euro, Jordan, the eternal cheese versus egg debate- yet most manage to reach a gruff compromise when it comes to naming the most banal day of any week. Tuesday.

Because it works like this. On a Monday you have weekend tales to tell, and in a strange way it can be nice to see people you haven’t seen for an entire two days again. You might even have a new shirt and tie from your weekend excursion to Gap. Wednesdays, well they tend to have office five-a-side in the evening, so the day can be spent picking and re-picking teams, as well as poring over the midweek football coupon.

Thursdays, well they are the start of the weekend these days aren’t they? And there are the five-a-side stories to embellish also. And the Friday feeling, twenty years after the PR department Crunchie tried and failed to, simply cannot be explained. You take that tie off and throw on the new polo, you plan a few drinks in a low-quality alehouse, you talk incessantly of plans for the weekend as if they are of great importance, and the work seems secondary somehow. Phones do not need answering, customers do not need serving, and the clock seems to be in on the act, ticking faster than normal.

Tuesday, by contrast, has nothing going for it. Sure you can chat about the Champions League action, but that only really helps fans of a couple of clubs (or the purist, but since when do they have office jobs?), you can maybe dissect a Monday night game (though SKY and ESPN seem reluctant to utilise this Premier League invention). Tuesdays drift by with nothing to discuss, nothing to enjoy, nothing to anticipate.

Well not any more. This week sees the most exciting time of year condense itself into….a Tuesday! Yes, the transfer window is slamming shut a day later than originally scheduled, due to an unforeseen Bank Holiday which will undoubtedly lead to a pile up of paperwork in the Premier League’s admin department, with most staff off parading round Notting Hill in hula skirts. So the 31st August deadline becomes the 1st September one. The Monday night deadline becomes the Tuesday teatime one.

And boy are we excited. Not as excited as Sky Sports News of course, that would be impossible, but excited nonetheless. Already sensible, grown men are preparing their phones for endless texts to news institutions offering dubious tip-offs. “Marouane Chamakh just arrived at my taxi rank looking for Shenley Training Centre, whatever could it mean?”

Some managers love the last few days of the deadline, Harry Redknapp is like the gambler who takes a jackpot out of a fruit machine- or twelve points from twelve- only to go after that repeat chance and throw another couple of million at a promising young full back.

Tony Pulis’ scout appears to have set up home in the North East and is attempting to relieve both Middlesbrough and Sunderland of all their players- expect Danny Collins and perhaps Kenwyne Jones to appear in a sentence beginning with “Stoke bid” before 5pm on Terrific Tuesday.

Paul Hart too, should be a busy man, Portsmouth’s squad quality may have plunged depths low enough to make Alain Perrin cackle, but he added four new faces on Friday. All of them rubbish. Expect a few more to fatten out the numbers over the next few days, with the last two remaining good players- David James and Niko Kranjcar- likely to leave.

Arsène Wenger is a lot more sensible of course, but still capable of a little deadline day indulgence. Andrey Arshavin was the (tedious) story of the last window, Lassana Diarra was snaffled on deadline day a couple of years back, Denílson a year previously. This year, he may decide to keep his credit card in his wallet after a useful start to the season, though if you ask most he should be scouring the aisles marked “Goalkeepers with goalkeeping ability” and “Strong tall centre midfielders”. Whether he will remains to be seen, Wenger is nothing if not loyal to his charges, but expect plenty of player sightings in and around St Albans this week.

Sir Alex Ferguson is another who is publicly sceptical of deadline day, though that didn’t stop him performing a Bronx-style kidnap on Dimitar Berbatov this time last year in a bid to stop the Bulgarian from taking his languid, chain-smoking, hair-flicking style to Manchester City. This year he has claimed a disinterest in further strengthening the Champions’ squad, though early signs suggest they may need a little fine tuning, perhaps in midfield. Looking round the pool of talent available however shows there are little obvious solutions to such a problem, particularly with Arjen Robben swapping white for red and Real Madrid for Bayern Munich this week.

Rafa Benítez meanwhile is turning over couches all over Merseyside as he looks to stump up enough cash to add in a bit more depth and quality to Liverpool’s squad. Sotirios Kyrgiakos may have been added, but at £2m represents the goo at the bottom of a barrel of sweets in terms of signings, and with the likes of Ryan Babel and Andriy Voronin showing little sign of covering for Gerrard and Torres consistently, a new forward option is patently needed. One wonders whether loan moves for the likes of Eidur Gudjohnsen or Ruud Van Nistelrooy would be feasible.

Manchester City seem to have quietened down a bit since they managed, via Joleon Lescott, to dismantle/galvanise (depending on who you listen to) Everton’s team spirit. Lescott & Sylvinho may be the end of Mark Hughes’ summer spending, but with City struggling to turn dominant possession into commanding wins, there may be a sneaky signing or two to arrive at Eastlands, even despite Pep Guardiola’s insistence that he holds little or no interest in signing Robinho.

And speaking of Everton, they are finally in a position to spend a bit of cash. But like the lad who has been out of work for so long that when he finally gets a paycheque, he spends it on needlessly costly designer clothes, David Moyes is taking risks in the market. Diniyar Bilyaletdinov cost £10m from Lokomotiv Moscow, whilst Sylvain Distin cost £5.3m from Portsmouth, both made a winning debut against Wigan yesterday. Reports suggest that perma-frown Scott Brown of Celtic, Johnny Heitinga of Atlético Madrid, and Ever Banega of Valencia will follow them into Finch Farm over the next few days, though Moyes’ forte has always been the capture and polishing of lesser known, hungrier players. His new policy will be under firm scrutiny over the coming months.

Elsewhere down the division, West Ham will be looking to sell before buying. Their latest raid on Serie B has been completed with the capture of Alessandro Diamante from Livorno (jury hasn’t even turned up yet on this one), but the likes of Carlton Cole, Matthew Upson and James Collins are all sure to be linked away as Gianfranco Zola attempts to balance the books, with an FA fine and potential ban for crowd disorder expected to add to the financial constraints at Upton Park. The Hammers have already turned down a bid for Upson from….Fiorentina?!!…but will be bracing themselves from bids from the likes of Villa &, of course, Spurs.

Phil Brown at Hull will be busy, and not just in the mirror either, as he looks to add low quality Sunderland players to his squad. Paul McShane looks a done deal, now if only we could get Daryl Murphy too, we would be certain to go down. Benjani may represent a better signing, though the fact that he was last seen carrying Emmanuel Adebayor’s luggage through the lobby of the Manchester Hilton may count against him.

Sunderland themselves are hatching a sneaky plan of their own, buoyed by Lee Cattermole’s decent start at the club, Steve Bruce is looking into a plan whereby every player who has a 6/10+ performance for Wigan over the last two seasons arrives on Wearside for big money- Maynor Figueroa and, cough, Titus Bramble the latest to be linked. Which is handy, because Roberto Martínez is adhering to a similar policy himself, with a sign in the DW Stadium reading “Wanted: Players. Must have Swansea/Spanish roots”. Jason Scotland and Jordi Gomez could soon be joined by Ferrie Bodde, Angel Rangel and John Toshack at Wigan (suppose it’s either that or bring back Amr Zaki and his ego?).

Which leaves the quieter clubs, Bolton, Blackburn, Villa. Villa should add to unfortunate Richard Dunne to their ranks before the close, whilst both Gary Megson and Sam Allardyce will no doubt be maximising the filter option on Football Manager in a bid for cheap/loan signings. The Lancashire clubs in particular appear in dire need of some investment, even if Bolton’s just comes in the kit department.

So make the most of this week boys (and girls, there is no reason why girls can’t love a bit of transfer action), enjoy the moment, this Tuesday may be one of a kind. Terrific, tasty, tantalising……tedious. Wait and see.

Get all the latest premier league transfers and transfer news from Europe here.

Liverpool have not won a league title in 19 years and up until last season they didn’t come close to even challenging for the title, with Chelsea emerging as the premier rivals to the trophy which Man Utd have won 11 times in 17 years. The domination of United had taken the sting out of one of the oldest rivalries in football but the occurrences of the last season have certainly heated up matters between the two clubs.

The History

The rivalry between the two most successful clubs in England transcends football. Its roots were formed back during the days of the industrial revolution. In the early 1800’s, Manchester was taking giant strides on its way to becoming an industrial hub. However, a lot of its raw material had to be shipped to England which could reach Manchester only via the port of Liverpool.

The system worked fine until Liverpool slapped a tax on all goods that were brought in through their port for the various importers in Manchester. Manchester retaliated audaciously and constructed an artificial canal which allowed goods to reach them directly. A ship, representing the canal, has made its way onto the badges of both Manchester clubs, United and City.

The hatred between the Mancs and Scousers (named so because apparently they used to survive on a cheap beef stew called ‘scouse’) is mutual, but the rivalry on the football field actually didn’t start until the decline of the other club from Merseyside, Everton.

After the WW II both clubs have had periods of domination over the other. United dominated the 50’s and clinched the 60’s by winning the European Cup under Sir Matt Busby, even though both teams won two League titles in the decade. The 70’s and 80’s saw the utter domination of Liverpool, with them going on to become the most successful club in English football history. With the turn of the new decade, the tables turned and United won 7 of next 11 titles and carried that success into the new millennium. Liverpool haven’t won a league title in 19 years but can still boast of being the most successful club in England with 5 European titles.

Recent Encounters

In recent times however, Sir Alex’s men have stamped their authority on the encounters. After Danny Murphy’s goal in 2004, no Liverpool player had scored a goal against Man Utd in the EPL till Ryan Babel broke the deadlock last season. United’s league doubles over their rivals along with a few 4-0 and 3-0 score lines had somewhat taken the excitement out of the contest.

Last Season

At the beginning of the last season, Man Utd were coming off the back off the double winning season while Liverpool ended another trophy-less season in a disappointing fourth position. Right at the beginning of the season, Liverpool stunned United by coming back from 1-0 down at Anfield to win 2-1 and handed Rafa Benitez his first victory over United in the Premier League. They followed this up with a wonderful run and found themselves well ahead of United come January.

Mid-way through the season came “Rafa’s Rant” when he launched a scathing personal attack on Sir Alex, the master of the mind-games. It was followed by both managers trading blows at every pre-match press conference. Ironically though, Liverpool’s form took a dip following the remarks and handed United the lead in the table.

Then came the day which no Man Utd fan would like to recollect. Liverpool came to the ‘Theatre of Dreams’ and humbled the champions 4-1 in a shocking display from the home team. Another defeat, of the once seemingly ‘Unbeatable’ Utd, in the following game set up a fascinating title chase.

However, United ended up lifting the Premiership trophy and more importantly equaled Liverpool’s record of 18 league titles and to the delight of the United faithful, Liverpool were the team they trumped over 38 games to earn it

Last season, the two clubs battled for supremacy on various levels, new signings Robbie Keane vs. Dimitar Berbatov, United’s flair vs. Liverpool’s discipline (although it turned out to be the opposite towards the closing stages of the season), Sir Alex vs. Rafa. United certainly had the last laugh but the double over United and the exciting title chase has certainly rekindled the hopes of the Liverpool faithful. The official season review of Man Utd mocks Rafa as it ends with- “The 11th time in 17 glorious seasons and the 18th title overall. AND THAT’S A FACT!!! !”

The rivalry never really died but the previous season has just brought the spark back into the biggest rivalry in English football.

Del Amitri and football are not something that usually mix. Certainly not with any success, anyway (see this example of World Cup pessimism for details). But whilst musing over Michael Owen’s “Eastenders-end-scene” switch to Manchester United this weekend, it was hard to ignore one of Justin Currie’s lyrics.

“It’s hard to say you love someone, and it’s hard to say you don’t”

Football fans tend to be a strange lot, immune from the usual boundaries of love and affection, but still willing to put their heart on the line time and time again. How many times has a promising start to a relationship been soured by a missed penalty, a serious injury, a murky transfer request, a painful departure? How many times have you thought your new £10m striker was “the one”, only to find he was actually El-Hadji Diouf? Or Emile Heskey?

In Owen’s case, things were a little easier. Liverpool fans had heard for years how this wonderkid was tearing up records for our youth team, and leading the charge for England schoolboys simultaneously. We had heard about his electrifying pace, his cold-eyed, surgical nature in front of goal, and the fact that he had a rock-solid personality. We had high hopes.

And then, in May 1997, we saw him. Seventeen years of age, not so much as a whisker adorning his chin, running clear of the Wimbledon defence to latch onto a pass from Stig Inge Bjørnebye, and sidefoot past Neil Sullivan with the panache and confidence that would become his trademark. It was in vain, defeat at Selhurst Park that night extinguished our bid for a title that had looked in the bag at the turn of the year (we famously ended up finishing fourth in a two horse race that season), but a star was very much born, the 1997-98 season was awaited with renewed optimism.

I remember that summer, 1997. All the talk was of one thing. Owen & Fowler. Fowler & Owen. These two strikers would go on to become the greatest partnership ever to wear the red of Liverpool, no doubt. Fowler had scored 31 goals in 1996-97, 36 the year before, 31 the season before that, and 18 in his debut campaign. He already wore the moniker of God as if it had been invented for him, fusing- as the Guardian’s Rob Smyth astutely observed recently- “the mischief of Ferris Bueller with the swagger of Liam Gallagher”. Now he had a sidekick, and not just any sidekick, one with the acceleration, awareness and self-belief to notch goals in any situation, against any defence.

And so we fell in love. We knew Owen had grown up an Evertonian, but then so had Fowler. And McManaman. And Rush. Never bothered us then, why should it concern us now? Especially when the kid was cool enough on his first senior start for the club to convert a penalty, again at Selhurst Park, again against Wimbledon, to earn us an opening day point. A week later his goal earned another draw at Blackburn, and his pace was already causing seasoned defenders to experience a set of emotions ranging from mild discomfort to all-out-distress. All of a sudden Liverpool had the hottest property in world football, and it looked like a marriage made in heaven.

Twenty three goals in his debut season was better than Fowler had managed in an admittedly weaker side four years previously, and his eighteen league strikes earned him a share of the golden boot with Dion Dublin & Chris Sutton (honest). But that spring, something changed with Owen and Liverpool fans. Something happened that really shouldn’t have made us feel the way it did. He made his England debut.

Aged 18 years and 59 days, Owen was the youngest England cap of the 20th century when he turned out against Chile at Wembley, and instantly the public clamour for his inclusion in the 1998 World Cup reached fever pitch. This kid simply had to go to France, Glenn Hoddle owed it to the nation. Not to Liverpool, but to England.

Some cynics argue that from the moment he made his England debut, Owen became England’s Michael Owen, rather than Liverpool’s. It is a tad harsh, after all it wasn’t Owen’s fault he scored the most incredible goal for his country at that World Cup, thus propelling himself to almost iconic status.

And it wasn’t as if his performances for Liverpool diminished either, the following season he managed 23 goals again, despite picking up a serious hamstring injury towards the back end of the season at Leeds. But still Liverpool fans found it hard to admit their feelings. Most still felt a sense of loyalty towards Fowler, even though God’s influence was waning as injuries took their toll on his youthfulness, whilst some simply found Owen’s apparent lack of personality a barrier. Either way, it is undeniable that he was never afforded the reverence his achievements arguably merited.

In my case, it was a little different. I can remember where I was when I fell in love with him. I was in my Grandad’s house, watching Liverpool, or more specifically, Owen, systematically dismantle Newcastle United at St James’ Park in August 1998. The game had an extra edge to it because it was the first game since the departure from Tyneside of Kenny Dalglish, to be replaced by Ruud Gullit and his brand of “sexy football”, the Gallowgate End was packed with dreadlocked wigs and optimism. And Owen humiliated them.

His first was a clinical poacher’s effort, smashing a rebound inside Shay Given’s near post after the Irishman had saved Paul Ince’s long-ranger, his second was all about pace and finishing as he raced clear onto McManaman’s pass to slide through Given’s legs, and his third was simply special, and secured my affections.

Picking up possession 45 yards from goal, Owen showed his strength to hold off the challenge of Laurent Charvet, before knocking the ball beyond the challenge of Phillipe Albert, and clipping the most exquisite of finishes beyond the flailing Given with the outside of his right foot, before celebrating with a surprisingly-amusing rub of his hands. It was class, and cheek, personified, and if you couldn’t love that then you didn’t deserve the lad.

Yet some people didn’t. They still cringed every time he appeared on television talking about wanting to do well for club and country, they still cursed when he sold his soul to advertise Lucozade et al, they still longed for Fowler to return to his old ways and give them someone edgier to worship again. But, painful as it is to say this, Fowler’s best days ended when his cruciate went at Goodison Park in 1998, and from then on it was Owen who carried the mantle for Liverpool, who Gérard Houllier built his team around, and who the fans were forced to build their dreams around.

For a while, it looked like our dreams- and Houllier’s- would be realised. Owen’s 24 goals in 2000/2001 helped Liverpool to an unprecedented League Cup, FA Cup & UEFA Cup treble, with his most memorable contribution coming in single-handedly overturning a goal deficit to Arsenal in the first ever Cardiff FA Cup final (the day even the non-believers were forced to believe).

The same year he picked up his most-famous hat-trick, in Munich against Germany, and in December, he became the first Englishman in twenty years to pick up the prestigious Ballon d’Or award as European Footballer of the Year. Meanwhile he was very much the premier striker at Liverpool now, with Fowler jettisoned to Leeds after an era-ending row with Phil Thompson. How could anyone doubt him? Especially as the next two seasons brought about the best goals return of his career (29 in all competitions), second place in the Premier League, and another League Cup triumph.

Yet in the meantime, there was an underlying problem with Owen at Liverpool. His contract, signed as a 20 year old with the world at his feet, was edging ominously close to its expiry date, and Owen was visibly disheartened at the diminishing quality of Liverpool’s squad under Houllier, and the increased burden he (along with the likes of Steven Gerrard & Jamie Carragher) was being forced to shoulder as a result.

Houllier’s departure in 2004 saw the arrival of Rafa Benítez and, with funds and squad depth in short supply, one of the Spaniard’s first acts was to take the tricky decision to sell Owen to Real Madrid for a cut-price £8m+ Real squad player Antonio Núñez. Liverpool fans were outraged and heartbroken in equal measures. Both at the board for allowing our best forward to leave for such a fee, but equally at Owen for seemingly walking out on the only club who would ever love him.

His year’s (under-rated) soiree in Spain completed, and with Liverpool bagging an improbable and unforgettable Champions League triumph, the time came for Owen to return to the Premier League. Would Liverpool be willing to forgive and forget? Would Owen? The answer seemed to be yes to both, but on 30 August 2005 came the news that all but ended a love affair that had seemed destined to last forever- Owen had joined Newcastle.

Liverpool it seemed could not match Real’s asking price, and England’s number one striker would be heading for the North East instead. His return to Anfield on Boxing Day 2005 saw what is commonly described as “a mixed reception”, the truth was there were more boos than cheers, and the only reason they seemed a bit muted were because we felt sorry for him having to play for such a poor side.

And to be fair, the sympathy was retained pretty much throughout his stay on Tyneside. Injury after injury, manager after manager, messiah after messiah, we all felt for Owen as his career faltered beneath the circus of St James’. He still showed glimpses of his old self, a brief reminder for England in the autumn of 2007, an apparent rebirth as an attacking midfielder under Kevin Keegan, but the general consensus was that Liverpool had seen the best days of Michael Owen, and for that it was perhaps time to let bygones be bygones, and appreciate the memories he gave us.

But then, this. Owen had been linked with some pretty surprising moves this summer in the wake of Newcastle’s relegation, Stoke, Hull, even Everton seemed well placed to snap him up. His advisors even commissioned a brochure advertising his services to potential suitors, with some pretty cringeworthy adjectives banded about (Owen apparently is not only “good-looking” and “cool” but also “sincere”).

It is doubtful that Sir Alex Ferguson would place too much stock in such a gimmick, but if, by chance, he did peruse the paraphernalia during his summer, then it is likely that one statistic will have jumped off the page at him. Owen last season managed just ten goals for Newcastle, but his chance conversion rate was statistically the best in the league. In a struggling side under immense pressure, that is no mean feat. At a better side that can be priceless. So United took the plunge. His wages are likely to be hefty (though no heftier than some), as is his signing on fee, but in truth the move represents little gambling from either side. Owen knows he will get chances, United know he will get goals.

But from a Liverpool fan’s perspective, it is a move that finally severs any ties Owen may still have with the club. It’s hard to say you love someone, but I loved Michael Owen. And it’s hard to say you don’t, well I don’t. Sorry Michael.

In life there are only a handful of things that are certain. You will watch Big Brother. It will irritate you. MPs will lie through their back teeth (and their front ones). Summer does make girls more attractive. And makes you feel less so. People who ring in radio stations with traffic updates are idiots.

And then there is the transfer window. That beautifully annoying invention that basically restricts trade in what should, theoretically, be a free market. That rumour-filled bearpit where the slightest whisper can suddenly become the dominant story, not just in football, but in society it would seem. MPs expenses or Ronaldo to Real? You decide? New series of Big Brother or David Villa’s future? Your choice.

The silly season is officially here, and if you listen to what you read and hear, there are more futures up in the air this summer than at an EasyJet recruitment convention.

Starting with the managers. Guus Hiddink had barely vacated his makeshift office at Chelsea by the time Carlo Ancelotti had arrived, laden with Versace luggage. The Italian will take command at Stamford Bridge officially from July 1st, but talk, incredibly, is already beginning to edge towards potential successors to his throne should he fail to deliver the kind of success Roman Abramovich apparently demands with such passion.

Elsewhere in the Premier League, Sunderland have moved swiftly to replace Ricky Sbragia- who departed tearfully minutes after his side had avoided relegation on the final day of the season- with Wigan’s Steve Bruce. Bruce’s Newcastle connections have been played up neatly by the media, but ignoring such playground mentality will enable Black Cats fans to see they have made what looks a very shrewd appointment. The fact that Bruce’s Wigan finished five places above Sunderland last season would confirm this. Certainly his appointment makes a lot more sense than the one touted by Roberto Mancini prior to Bruce’s appointment. One wonders if the former Inter Milan chief had received some sort of prank call as he gleefully announced that he was all set to arrive at the Stadium of Light, before being forced into an embarrassed climb-down only days later.

And for every departure, there must be an arrival of course. The Bruce-shaped hole at Wigan will be filled- metaphorically speaking- by Swansea’s Roberto Martinez, subject to the agreement of a compensation package. Martinez has made steady progress at the Liberty Stadium, but as a former Wigan favourite, and with his reputation significantly enhanced by the aesthetic qualities of his Championship outfit, the time seems perfect for a step up into the top-flight.

Even outside of the Premier League, things are looking strange. Steve Coppell’s vacation of the Reading hotseat in the wake of their Play-Off semi final defeat to Premiership newboys Burnley meant that chairman John Madejski had to act quickly. An approach for Peterborough’s Darren Ferguson was rebuked, so in sauntered Watford boss Brendan Rogers. Rogers had only just taken delivery of a personalised name-plate for his office at Vicarage Road before he was digging out his suitcase and zooming from Hertfordshire to Berkshire, having spent just five months at Watford.

And the Championship’s most illustrious disastrous club, Newcastle, should not be forgotten. Alan Shearer has already made the least surprising U-Turn since Sven-Goran Eriksson tried to walk past Ulrika Jonsson’s hotel room by announcing his intention to stay on as manager at St James’ Park, but the ownership situation on Tyneside has meant that such an appointment has been forced to stay on ice. Good news for Joe Kinnear then, who was set to sign a two-year contract this summer before the arrival of a sharp dressed messiah put him firmly in the shade.

And then there is Celtic. Wee Gordon Strachan, patronising nickname notwithstanding, decided the time was right to bring an end to his four year stay in Glasgow in the wake of a disappointing end to the SPL season, and will not be particularly missed by certain sections of Parkhead. But Hoops fans who have long questioned the credentials of a flame haired former Aberdeen man would be wise to remember the old adage “Be careful what you wish for” as former Wycombe & Portsmouth failure Tony Adams throws his hat into the ring for the role of Strachan’s replacement. Unless Adams has been receiving the same kind of calls as Mr Mancini- unlikely considering the pair’s background differences- it is a worrying situation for Celtic, especially with more suitable candidates in David Moyes & Owen Coyle distancing themselves from the inevitable speculation, and Tony Mowbray keeping an equally low profile.

So what about the players? Well the football world has been riddled skulduggery in the past twenty years anyway, but this summer things look set to escalate. If it isn’t nailed down it is unsafe, so it would seem. Cristiano Ronaldo’s will-he-won’t he move to Real Madrid this year may well be the most tiresome saga since, erm, last years saga of the same name, but with Florentino Perez targeting players like Big Brother contestants target fame, it is likely to rumble on long into the summer.

Real are not looking to stop at Ronaldo either, they have already secured Villarreal coach Manuel Pellegrini to lead the revolution, a notoriously ego-free coach in a notoriously egotistical club is a dangerous thought. Spanish football writer Sid Lowe was asked this week to predict Real’s starting eleven for next season, and incredibly went for this- Iker Casillas, Sergio Ramos, Pepe, Bruno Alves, Gael Clichy, Ronaldo, Xabi Alonso, Lassana Diarra, Franck Ribery, Kaka, Diego Forlan/David Villa. Impressive to say the least, and such transfers would set in motion an incredible snowballing effect surely, with ripples felt as far north as….well, Manchester I suppose.

Of those signings, Alonso looks unlikely. Liverpool’s owners may well be losing more money than Steve Claridge in Cheltenham week, but with Gareth Barry having swapped sixth placed Aston Villa for tenth placed Manchester City in a bid to secure Champions League football, Alonso is expected to stay on Merseyside. One man who resisted overtures from City, Kaka, is high on Madrid’s wishlist, and sources close to the club and the player claim a world-record deal is close to completion, despite rumoured interest from Chelsea.

Should Kaka leave Milan then it will give Silvio Berlusconi & Adriano Galliani license to spend some of their lucre in a more flamboyant manner, although the likelihood is that they will offer the lot to LA Galaxy for three more weeks of David Beckham. Emmanuel Adebayor has long been on their list, although English media reports suggest that Chelsea may make a bid to gazump them in that respect, providing they can wake the Togolese striker up from his twelve month slumber in the meantime.

Chelsea are supposed to be spending big this summer. After all, they only paid £14m for a right back to replace their £13.2m one last summer, along with £9m for a luxury midfielder, following a £25m splurge in the January 08 window. Small fry. Kaka & Adebayor aside, rumours abound that David Villa, Franck Ribery and….erm…Daniel Sturridge will be arriving at Stamford Bridge, though no concrete bid has been reported as of yet.

And what of Manchester United. Ronaldo and Tevez are looking able to leave, whilst Berbatov looks barely able to run, but Ferguson is a wily old fox. Having already added two Serbian stars in Zoran Tosic & Adam Ljajic in January, the man from Govan is likely to be looking bigger this summer, with Ribery, Lyon’s Karim Benzema, and even Arjen Robben spotted apparently. Should Ronaldo leave, the funds freed up would arguably cover two of those players, though little has been said by the man himself. He has left that to rent-a-quote Ronaldo.

Liverpool meanwhile are looking a little bit less adventurous in the wake of their owners’ confirmed £42m losses last year, a £2m bid for Portsmouth’s Sylvain Distin is unlikely to get pulses racing, and there are fears that they may be priced out of a move for Tevez, Valencia duo Villa & Silva, or even another Portsmouth defender in Glen Johnson. Still, Andriy Voronin is back from a loan spell in Germany, and Jermaine Pennant will return from Portsmouth too. Like having two new signings that.

At Arsenal, Arsene Wenger is scouring Football Manager searching for young talent. The signing of Andrey Arshavin in January may have bucked the transfer trend at the Emirates, but Wenger will be more concerned about rumoured interest in Robin Van Persie & Cesc Fabregas from Barcelona at the moment, with Thierry Henry & Aliaksandr Hleb doubtless whispering sweet nothings in their ears. Barcelona are looking to add a left back to their European Cup winning squad, so don’t be surprised to see Gael Clichy appear on their radar at some point also.

And what of Manchester City of course. Barry’s arrival, said Mark Hughes, will not be the last. They have already been linked with 4562 players, including Samuel Eto’o (unlikely), Xabi Alonso (very unlikely) and Carlos Tevez (ridiculous). Armed with cash, expect City to get hold of some eye-catching signings before August is out. And then expect them to still be inconsistent and self-destuctive.

Elsewhere there have already been some big moves, Bayern Munich’s response to missing out on the Bundesliga title was a big money splurge on VfB Stuttgart’s goal-machine Mario Gomez, to add to Zenit St Petersburg skipper Anatoliy Tymoschuk, moves which could well pave the way for Ribery to depart for Real, Barca, Manchester United or Chelsea. Two of their rivals have already been weakened then, Diego swapping the green of Bremen for the stripes of Juventus, who have also recaptured (and it isn’t hard considering how slow he moves these days) Fabio Cannavaro from Real Madrid.

Serie A champions Inter have already made moves to strengthen also, swapping Ricardo Quaresma & Hernan Crespo for Genoa duo Diego Milito & Thiago Motta, with doubts lingering over the future of Zlatan Ibrahimovic, although his wage demands and apparent lack of success in Europe may see him remain at the San Siro.

So with Ronaldo going to Real, meaning Ribery goes to United, meaning Hleb goes to Bayern, and Fabregas goes to Barca, so Kalou goes to Arsenal, so Villa goes to Chelsea, so Drogba goes to Milan, so Kaka goes to Real, so Van der Vaart goes to Arsenal, so Van Persie goes to Barca, so Eto’o goes to City, and so forth until we all experience an aneurism, expect the spectacular, expect the astonishing, expect the unexpected. Expect to get slightly bored by it all and start watching the Ashes. I know I will.