The anti-football of Mourinho and Capello can reap rewards, but more is needed for England to be contenders for EURO 2012.

On the face of it, it was not overly surprising. The 7th best team in the world, England, beat the best team in the world, Spain, 1-0 at home in a friendly international. Bearing in mind that Spain also lost friendlies to Italy, Portugal and Argentina since they won the World Cup last summer, it certainly is not a result that will cause too many ripples in world football.

It was the manner of victory that was far more interesting. Some commentators have suggested the victory paid homage to Capello’s ultra-defensive catenaccio ways so successfully employed in the 1990s with Milan, with a solid back four and protection from deep lying and combative midfielders frustrating Spain. Along with much of the Spanish team, Cesc Fabregas labelled England’s gameplan as “negative tactics”, lambasting them for “lacking in talent” and setting up to defend for nearly the entire 90 minutes.

However, the whole scenario has parallels with far more recent events. Given the core of players who make both Spain and Barcelona tick and the similarities in style, to all intents and purposes it is the Barcelona influence (supplemented by the best of Real Madrid) that has made Spain both European and World champions. And the only man who has been able to find the methods to challenge the Barcelona way in the past few seasons has been a long time friend of the English, Jose Mourinho. Two series of fixtures in particular spring to mind.

April 2010 witnessed a Champions League semi-final between Mourinho’s Internazionale and Barcelona. The first leg demonstrated a Mourinho masterclass of defensive pressing and swift counter attack as Inter won 3-1. The 2nd leg, despite Inter losing 1-0, was in truth even more impressive. Down to 10 men for over an hour, Inter soaked up everything Barcelona could throw at them. The statistics were bewildering. Inter managed just 67 passes as opposed to Barca’s 548 and over 80% possession. There were even charges (though denied by Mourinho) that Inter were happy to give the ball to Barcelona so as to not disrupt their own defensive shape.

Fast-forward a year to the latter end of last season. Mourinho’s Real Madrid held Barcelona to a 1-1 draw in La Liga followed swiftly by a 1-0 victory in extra time over their archrivals in the Copa del Rey. In both these matches, Mourinho operated with a ‘trivote’ system, sacrificing an attacking player in favour of a defensive midfielder.

Mourinho used Pepe, a natural central defender, as a midfield enforcer alongside Xabi Alonso and Sami Khedira, all focusing on defensive tasks and keeping Barcelona largely at bay. The use of Phil Jones in a side also containing James Milner, Frank Lampard and the imperious Scott Parker on Saturday bore considerable resemblance to this strategy.

Over these two fixtures, Real Madrid registered a mere 22% possession and 65% pass success as opposed to Barca’s 78% possession and 90% pass success. Yet it reaped dividends for Mourinho – and almost continued to work in the Champions League semi-final between the clubs until Madrid were reduced to 10 men and Messi ran riot.

To anyone who watched England soak up the Spanish possession (71%) and pressure continuously on Saturday evening, this may make familiar reading. This is not to suggest this is the way football should be played all the time. It is definitely not what England should look to repeat too often. And it certainly will not work every time it is tried. But under the right circumstances the methods employed by Capello on Saturday can be very effective.

Ultimately the most important question is whether England can be contenders at EURO 2012. Much has been made of England’s ongoing attempts to emulate the Spanish style, assurance on the ball and technique with the next generation of players. Nevertheless to be contenders in the short term, England must not necessarily look to Spain. The gulf in class is too great at present. In fact we should look to Germany for inspiration.

England should build on the defensive prowess and determination that they have long been renowned for and personified by Scott Parker against Spain. The challenge for England is to add the power, pace and counter-attacking devastation of the type displayed by Germany at the last World Cup to a steely defence. If Bent and Walcott are not the answer, then the likes of Sturridge, Welbeck, Adam Johnson, Ashley Young and Aaron Lennon could well have parts to play in the absence of Wayne Rooney and the increasingly injury plagued Steven Gerrard and Jack Wilshere.

If Capello manages to blend the right personnel before EURO 2012, England might be able to compete with the top nations next summer.

From Soccerlens.com - Football News

Last night Wayne Rooney’s astonishing moment of stupidity ensures that Manchester United star is set to miss the start of Euro 2012 next year. It remains to be seen whether he is handed more than a single match ban by UEFA for his act of madness. Wayne’s attack at at Dzudovic’s shin seemed as worst as Arshavin’s kick against Andorra that got him banned for the first two games of Euro 2008. Although England earned the one point needed to qualify for the championships, still they were in a winning position when Rooney got sent off and the manager just could not defend his player’s act.

“It’s a red card. You can’t defend that. I’m not happy, absolutely,”

“I spoke with him. He made a silly mistake and he said: ‘Yes, sorry”

Well sorry is not good enough for England. Rooney only had one major international competition where he excelled, 7 years back in Euro 2004. Other than that he only had horrendous outings. Sent off against Portugal in WC 2006 being highly annoyed playing as a lone striker, the team could not qualify for Euro 2008 and he was one of the flops of the tournament at last year’s World Cup. The criticism is fair enough. It will be a crime to say that Peter Crouch is better player than Rooney but their stats for England tell another story. The former Everton player has never been able to emulate his fantastic club form for national side, mind you, in major competitions not in friendlies and certain qualifiers.

If you ask Manchester United fans, they say that Rooney was rushed back into the side both in 2006 and 2010 World Cup. In 2006 he came back from a metatarsal injury and was never fully fit to have much impact and again in 2010 he got a knock for which he did not take part in last few games of the season but started the first game for England. So if Rooney doesn’t get the injury excuse this time around, he made sure that his disorderly start to major tournaments for England continues as his frustration cost him and his nation last night.

The Montenegro manager, Branko Brnovic claimed that he was surprised to see the England international take part in the game.

“I read in the newspapers that Rooney has some family problems in England. To be honest I didn’t expect him to play because those things are serious and it’s not easy to concentrate on the game,”

“They’re serious and maybe that’s why he did what he did.”

On the other hand Fabio Capello disagreed with these comments and claimed that Rooney was annoyed as he missed certain passes and could not control the ball well during the match so for this reason he took out his frustration and kicked the opponent. Having said that Capello added that he cannot get into Rooney’s head to know what is going on and why he reacted in such a way.

Whatever the reason might be for his reaction, the bottom line is that he will miss the start of Euro 2012 campaign. His suspension might just be blessing in disguise for England as he has not been able to help the nation much when it comes to the big stage. So perhaps the three lions can form a system that is effective without him. But I guess that will not happen as for England star names play and not the ones who are best for the system. Having said that Rooney is without a doubt an exceptional talent but whether his shaky start will affect his national side yet again, Only time will tell.

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From Soccerlens.com - Football News

Fabio Capello earns 6 million pounds a year. That’s £500,000 a month, over £115,000 a week and nearly £16,500 a day. There were nearly 85,000 people at Wembley on Saturday to watch England’s lacklustre performance in their 2-2 draw with Switzerland, and the majority of them could only dream of earning in a year what Capello earns in a week. Yet, despite this variance in income the majority of those in attendance could have called the England coach’s bungles right from the off.

The most glaring error was the decision to leave Ashley Young on the bench. Capello’s supporters would say hind sight is a wonderful thing. Unfortunately for Fabio he doesn’t seem to have many of those. Young has been one of the inform players during the second half of the Premier League season and he has been one of, if not the, stand out player for England in recent matches. The decision to leave him out was preposterous and lacked any shred of common sense.

Capello should have started Young on the left hand side of the front three giving him the licence and freedom to drift in and support Darren Bent. Instead he opted to start with James Milner. This was a cautious move akin to the stereotypical political stance of the opposition’s government. If you sit on the fence for too long you will end up with splinters in your back side. After such a tactical folly Capello will be counting his bank notes this week with an uncomfortable sharp pain in his rear end. Milner is of course a useful player but he is much more defensive minded. He simply doesn’t have the pace and attacking verve of Young.

Milner would be much more of an astute pick for an away day where a solid performance and a point may be deemed a good result. But with England being in the position they were before the game, sitting on top of Group G already six points ahead of Switzerland, this should have been a day for going for the jugular and capitalising on such a solid position.

Credit must go to Switzerland, they played well. Gokhan Inler and Xherand Shaqiri were particularly effective, but Wembley should have been a fortress. It was far from that. The fans where disheartened and England’s conservatism allowed Switzerland into the game. They were granted far too much time and space giving them the confidence to find their feet, which in turn led to them penetrating England’s ineffective armour twice in the space of three minutes grabbing two opportunistic goals.

Only when Young came on after the interval did England show any conviction and adventure going forward. It is true the non-selection Young shouldn’t be the only point of discussion on what was dismal performance all round, but such decisions can act as a catalyst for negativity.

Capello had his squad together the best part of a week before the game. It’s his job as head coach to utilise that time to get his players focussed and in the right state of mind for the match. True, all of the players are professionals who play at the highest level week in week out, but it is still up to the manager to set the tone whether that’s in drills on the training ground, in team meetings, one on one discussions or team selections.

From the outside looking in it seems Capello is lost in international management and he seems disconnected from his players and the fans. He says the wrong things at the wrong times and he appears to lack authority. If we can see this what must the players within the squad think? Such a lack of authority and direction only breeds negativity in the camp. This was transferred on to the pitch and it was clear to see during a woeful first half performance.

When Capello was appointed in 2007, then Chief Executive Brian Barwick sang his man’s praises. ‘He is a winner’ said Barwick, suggesting Capello had the metal to get the best out of England’s underachieving golden generation. Where is this metal now? After Saturday’ s match Capello came out to face the press saying his players were exhausted. This is garbage. These men are finely tuned athletes. They play and practice hard but their bodies are looked after with the utmost care and attention. They are primed for battle by teams of people from dieticians to psychologists to physical trainers.

Even if the players were weary either mentally or physically after what has undoubtedly been a long hard season, it is up to the manager to either prepare and motivate them so they are ready to play, or rest them for somebody who is in better physical or mental state. Capello is the manager, his job is in his title. It seems he is not doing his job.

Steve McLaren was given the heave ho for being disconnected amid accusations he couldn’t get the best out of his players. His umbrella moment sealed his fate and it appears Capello is going down the same route. Must we wait for another Mr Bean moment before England can move forward, or can the top dogs for once act proactively rather than reactively.

On a positive note, The FA are doing some good things currently. Gareth Southgate has been appointed as head of elite development for the FA and he is currently lobbying county FA’s around the country advocating the need for smaller games and smaller pitches in an attempt to improve technique at grassroots level. The thought is that if kids grow up playing in smaller spaces with less time to react they will learn to manoeuvre the ball more effectively. Finally it appears changes are being made to the way our children learn the game, something which can only bode well for the future. Maybe we will have Iniesta’s and Xavi’s of our own in 20 years time.

As for the current crop, it’s clear changes are required there too. As the FIFA flag fluttered forlornly under the Wembley arch on Saturday, some home truths were delivered to this current set up. Forget Blatter, maybe England require some top down restructuring of their own. Capello out.

You can follow the author on Twitter.

From Soccerlens.com - Football News

Anointing a youngster “future England regular” is an exercise both in optimism and presumption. There have been several recent nominees for the position future England star – from Jermaine Defoe, through Jack Wilshere, Andy Carroll and even Adam Johnson. Each has had their sparkly moments in the Three Lions’ shirt and as Fabio Capello begins to assemble his squad for Euro 2012, certain names have been categorized already: Rooney – definitely, Lampard – probably, Naughton – perhaps, Bothroyd – unlikely, Scholes – I wish and Nugent – never in a million years.

Here’s one more suggestion for that “perhaps” category, a bolter from the field: Scott Sinclair, of Swansea City. In fact, it’s not too long a bow to draw to suggest he should have been considered for a call-up to the current England training camp as they prepare to face Switzerland. Take note he probably doesn’t deserve a place in the team just yet, but with his Championship form, Chelsea pedigree and blistering pace down the left of midfield he – and England – can only benefit from his exposure to top level competition.

The former Chelsea man isn’t the best English left winger in the country. He may not even make the top seven. But what he does offer is an abundance of pace, youth, finishing skills and enthusiasm. In International football, speed is a crucial part of a team’s gameplan and something- Theo Walcott’s fragile body apart – that the Three Lions lack. He may develop into a gamebreaker (or not) but to include him at this juncture would only aid England’s process of ensuring the most appropriate talent makes their representative team.

Understanding that during their past few internationals England have trotted out James Milner, Stewart Downing and Ashley Young as regular left midfielders – Milner the incumbent and deserving Villa pair rewarded for good Premiership form. Other wide players like Matt Jarvis and Johnson round out the England squad – both of good, but not world-class standard. It’s hard to believe that Sinclair is that far removed from that second level, especially when viewed on a purely physical basis. Man City’s Johnson went from the Championship with Middlesbrough to the national setup within months of his acquisition by the Citizens and appears as if he has an England future. Sinclair could do the same.

The argument for calling up the Swans’ star is simple: why not? What has England got to lose? They include an upcoming youngster, give him exposure to training with top-class talent and play him only if they’re confident he won’t let the side down. If he’s not good enough, so be it – he can easily not be included in their matchday team. His Championship background shouldn’t scare Capello – the Italian called up Jay Bothroyd earlier this season and Sinclair’s record (27 goals in all competitions this year) is comparable to, if not better than, that of the former Cardiff City striker.  He’s already in the system as well as a regular for Stuart Pearce’s U-21 mob.

As any four-year old is frustratingly aware, the simple rebuttal to an argument of “Why not?” is “Why?”. England have a bevy of wide players with better and more established pedigrees – ranging from Milner to Jarvis. To represent one’s country should be earned and it’s questionable that Sinclair has done so. Often, managers look for two years of performances before rewarding players with higher honours.  But really, does training with the National squad have the same weight of meaning? Two years ago, Joe Lewis of Peterborough was called into the England training camp while Jordan Henderson’s tremendous start to last season got him an England cap, after which his form tailed away. To look back on those two’s call-ups is to ask if they truly deserved them also.

Scott Sinclair will find out later this year when Swansea City begin their Premiership campaign if he’s quite the player he seems. But Fabio Capello’s watching brief shouldn’t just include obtaining results but developing the national team for the future as well – and Scott Sinclair’s definitely one to watch. It appears he has missed a trick by disregarding the young Swan.

For more commentary and analysis, shoot across to  Matthew Wood’s blog, Balanced Sports. You can also follow him on Twitter - @balanced_sports.

From Soccerlens.com - Football News

Bobby Zamora fully deserves his call-up to the England squad for the UEFA EURO 2012 Qualifying game against Switzerland, with the Fulham man registering a superior minutes per goal rate in the 2010/11 Premier League to any of the other forwards in Fabio Capello’s latest squad.

Zamora has endured an injury-hit season, but in his limited playing time he netted five goals, one more than Spur striker Peter Crouch, despite a more substantial playing time. The Fulham hitman’s rate of a goal every 152 minutes is also superior to Aston Villa’s Darren Bent. As well as scoring himself, Zamora has also provided five assists in the league this season, along with a goal-scoring chance every 40 minutes, again a better rate than his fellow Three Lions’ strikers. With Wayne Rooney suspended for the game at Wembley, Capello will be hoping his other striking options can provide a vital cutting edge on the 4^th, with Zamora deserving of a start at the end of a frustrating season for the striker.

England Strikers – Premier League 2010/11

SWISS STRIKERS NEED TO START FIRING

Switzerland’s strikers have struggled to find their best form in the UEFA EURO 2012 qualifiers so far, netting only one goal in a combined 769 minutes of action so far.

That one goal equates to just 20% of Switzerland’s total goal haul in the competition, a joint-low percentage (including only teams to score at least five goals). This failure to find the back of the net regularly is in sharp contrast to Switzerland’s 2010 FIFA World Cup Qualifying campaign, when their forward line netted 11 of their team’s 18 goals. The now retired Blaise N’Kufo scored five of those goals, while another player to end his international career (albeit more recently, in April), Alexander Frei also netted five on the road to South Africa. With Marco Streller also calling time on his international career, at the same time as Frei, the Swiss desperately need a new and revitalised forward line if they are to inspire the Swiss to a memorable victory on June 4^th.

Switzerland’s Strikers In UEFA EURO 2012™ Qualifiers

*only including teams to score five or more goals

Lowest Proportion Of Goals By Strikers – UEFA EURO 2012™ Qualifiers

*at least five goals

From Soccerlens.com - Football News

In order to avoid a repeat of the media circus surrounding the issue of the England captaincy, Fabio Capello has pre-emptively named his next captain for the World Cup qualifier against Switzerland on June 4^th.

In the presence of the assembled media, the Italian schemer revealed with trademark clarity: “I choose new captain for game after next game. Much considered. I select Gareth. Strong player, quick in the brain. Confidence that old age will be no issue.” When a puzzled Chris Etheridge of the Sunday Times pointed out that Manchester City midfielder Barry was barely thirty years old, Capello replied: “Barry? Who is Barry? No. I talk about Wycombe winger. Ainsworth is, as you English say, no spring chicken, but is good choice.”

Ainsworth, who turns thirty-eight this May, was understandably delighted, saying: “Hopefully I can keep the captaincy for at least an entire half. After that, who knows?” It is thought that Capello will rotate the armband on a game-by-game basis in order to stamp out the immoral debauchery and controversy that a prolonged captaincy can bring to a player’s personal life. To make such rotation possible, the Italian stated that he would “make captain all players in Football League by the time contract runs out in 2012.”

When asked if Gerrard, Terry and Ferdinand still had a look-in for the captaincy in the future, Mr. Capello said: “Anthony, yes. Paul, yes. Anton…why not. Also yes.” Players believed to be on Capello’s short-term shortlist include Russell Hoult, Clarke Carlisle, Jack Lester, Kenny Lunt and even Robbie Fowler, who may yet be coaxed out of international retirement.

Public and pundit reaction to the ex-Real Madrid coach’s latest scheme has been largely critical. Former England captain and crisp connoisseur Gary Lineker blasted: “There used to be a time when the captain’s armband really meant something. Now, I wouldn’t even wipe my backside with it. Unless Italia ’90 repeated itself. But that’s a mitigating circumstance.” FA Director of Football Development Trevor Brooking was more positive about the new itinerary nature of the captaincy: “This way, there’s no squabbling, in-fighting or jealousy, as everyone knows that they’ll get their turn.”

When asked why vice-captain Steven Gerrard was contacted about the latest captaincy handover and not incumbent captain John Terry, Capello fired back: “I talk to vice-captain because he is vice-captain. I not talk to captain because he is captain no more. It is like shoe and plimsoll. I wear shoe on my foot because it is shoe. I do not wear plimsoll because it is out of season. It hurt my toes. It is useless and smelly and I no care.”

This article constitutes satire. Despite the use of real footballers, the events discussed within the article are humorously fictional, and should not be taken deadly seriously.

From Soccerlens.com - Football News

Jack Wilshere is the future. The chosen one, he’s the face of English football for the twenty-first century. Miraculously, he remains somewhat personally underexposed for the amount of hype that surrounds him. Without him, the future of both Arsenal and England seems less positive.

His rise has been meteoric. Two seasons ago he was a seventeen year-old making occasional Carling Cup appearances, whereas today he is first-choice for both club and country. People have lined up to douse him with praise, not least his managers Arsene Wenger and Fabio Capello. The future’s rosy, the future’s Wilshere.

But his wish to play in the Euroean Under-21 Championships this year has put Wilshere’s two footballing allegiances on a direct collision course. North London management has no desire to risk their prize asset suffering burn-out, injury or fatigue. In the eyes of Stuart Pearce and many others, he is England U21s best midfielder and hence the best chance of a podium finish at the tournament.

Which poses the question – is Jack Wilshere more valuable to England or to Arsenal?

There are many parallels between the Wilshere dilemma and that of Wayne Rooney 6-7 years ago – he is young, talented and enthusiastic about playing for both club and country. Their teams are/were in the Top Four and each represented the tantalising taste of a new, unscarred generation. Wilshere, like his now struggling colleague has the combination of exuberance, sublime skill and mongrel that has occasionally looked lacking in his teams and is so crucial to success – the mix to become a world-beater.

Since Rooney’s debut, the only potential world-beaters to debut for the Three Lions have been (maybe) Arsenal teammate Theo Walcott and custodian Joe Hart. Other England debutants have been functional and usually leading premiership players but most often limited; Jack Wilshere’s recent displays in white mean he should be among the first midfielders Capello selects.

Not only is it Wilshere’s talent and potential that’s vital to England, but also what he represents. Jack Wilshere is the first of his U21 brethren to make the leap to full International regular. Though it’s likely, Wilshere isn’t necessarily even the most talented player of his generation either, just the first to make his mark on the international stage and therefore the best for his age. He is a glimpse into the future of England football, impossible to ignore. Jack Wilshere needs to play for England not for Fabio Capello, Arsene Wenger or even himself, but for English football fans.

The word talisman is overused in football – “As Zidane goes, so does France”. “As Cantona performs, so do United”. Though those two players properly defined the word talisman, they could also simply be known as instrumental in performance. The word is belittled when lower echelon players are dubbed a talisman rather than instrumental. Wilshere’s importance for the national setup has now transcended his increasingly important performances on the pitch and he has become a talisman of things to come.

This may be true of England, but what of Arsenal? Their case is also based on what he represents: a local boy with the talent to stamp his authority on a famous club with an equally famous (and expensive) lineup. It could be that his value for Arsenal, moreso than England, depends on his performances simply because there would seem to be greater central midfield depth. This depth comes from players in their prime, like Fabregas, Song and Nasri or the potential of Aaron Ramsey, Henri Lansbury and even Abou Diaby.

Jack the Lad’s skill/mongrel ratio is weighted differently from each Arsenal’s midfielders and his enthusiasm and work ethic allow him a unique role and thus able to fit in seamlessly with all of Wenger’s other options. He is so treasured by Arsenal supporters (host of the Arsenal podcast The Tuesday Club Alan Davies recently said he wouldn’t swap Wilshere for Andres Iniesta) because he forms with Nasri and Fabregas a vital component in a troika of midfield poisons of which an opponent must choose one. Of course England relies on his performances as well, but for the Gunners faithful, they know they have a player on whom they can rely.

The question presents an unthinkable and theoretical choice, but it may be England’s bigger picture need which means Wilshere is more valuable to the Three Lions than for Arsenal. If only for reasons of depth – while Lampard, Gerrard and Barry drift into the ether, Wilshere has been anointed to pick up the pieces, perhaps even as captain.

At Arsenal, he is supported by the high-profile-but-still-amazingly-young trio Fabregas, Ramsey and Nasri. Song and Diaby remain in their early or mid-twenties, where Lansbury and Miyaichi look to follow his lead. Wilshere’s value to Arsenal is immense – measurable only by a fictional, guesstimated transfer price (40-50 million pounds perhaps, in the unthinkable situation of him wanting out of Arsenal).  He may not be replaceable, but there is more fertile soil for Wenger to plough in search of a substitute.  For England, he is new hope.  Can you measure that?

Matthew Wood writes at Balanced Sports.

From Soccerlens.com - Football News

In what can only be described as a pamphlet rather than a book, eloquent and multilingual manager Fabio Capello has outlined how the average trophy-laden foreign coach can transfer their success to the English continent in just one hundred easy-to-master words.

The pamphlet, entitled How To Coach In Place You No Speak Good, was ghostwritten by his assistant Stuart Pearce, due to Fabio’s poor grasp of the English language. It outlines the most important phrases in a foreign manager’s repertoire in ten short and easy to digest chapters:

Pleasantries: “Hello”, “goodbye”, “yes”, “no”. Four words that should guide you through four months of press conferences whilst you get to grips with the indigenous people’s language.

Generic Phrases: Without simple commands like “go” and “stop”, “run” and “walk” and “move” and “there”, players would not be sufficiently pitch-trained, and would just do their own thing, running in circles and urinating on the astroturf. Reinforcing phrases like “faster”, “stronger”, “better” and “taller” will indeed make players play faster, stronger and better, but may not actually make players taller.

Attacking: Self-explanatory. The basics are covered, from “pass” and “cross” to the more elaborate “shoot” and “score”, with everything in between.

Defending: A little more pragmatic. The lexis is not as simple as when players have the ball, so suggestible words like “shirt”, “kick”, “tight” and “commit” can take on different meanings in conjunction with crazed facial expressions.

Abstract Terminology: Talking in abstract terms about a literal event can involve everyone in successes and distract everyone from failings. Phrases like “spirit” and “confidence”, popularised by foreign counterparts like Arsene, are integral when dealing with the media and falsely building up hope within your squad. Other words include “drive”, “passion” and “verve”. Use all in conjunction with the pronoun “we”.

Feelings: Whilst on the topic of interpersonal relationships, these words show that you are still human, despite talking like a badly programmed android. Stick to basic phrases like “good” and “bad”, “happy” and “sad”, “pleased” and “upset”. Some words are important, like “smelly” and “constipated”, but should not be used in the presence of the media.

Names: It is important to familiarise yourself with at least a few of the players. Talk lots about three or four players, then slowly learn the names of the others, and casually drop them into interviews so that it looks like you know them well. Journalists will like it if you refer to “Rio” and “Jack” on first name terms, but will equally acknowledge that calling players “Gerrard” and “Lampard” is often more respectful. Also, players will greatly appreciate being called something other than “hey you there”.

Locations: Directions are not necessarily important, as the relevant people will take you to where you need to go, but in order to do so, you will need to know the names of your desired destinations. For instance, knowing “England” is not enough: learn two or three city names, like “London” or “Manchester”. What’s more, learning how to say “Brighton” or “Soho” will open some doors in your personal and professional life.

Personal: Tell people you like things. It’s the best way to make friends and make the people of a country like you. Make sure you can say your favourite food in the native’s tongue (“spaghetti”, “steak”), clothing (“loafers”), film (“Robert De Niro”) and even music (“Jimi Hendrix”). Don’t bother learning words about the culture. You will not sample it, and if you do, you will not enjoy it.

Taboo Subjects: These phrases should not be used unless directly addressing the guilty player in your squad. In England specifically, it is important to learn the following words: “alcohol”, “prostitute”, “romp” and “steroids”. Do not, when questioned by journalists or Sheiks, mention words relating to personal controversies. Me personally, I cannot use the words “Bernstein”, “contract”, “scandal” or “nappyrash”, but it helps to learn the words regardless.

In total, Capello selects ninety-seven words which he believes are integral to coaching in England: the rest he ignorantly discards. According to Opta stats, the word Capello uses with the most frequency is “hey”, closely followed by “win” (mostly used in a pre-match context) and “sad” (prevalent in post-match interviews). The England manager stresses the need to use as few syllables as possible for ease of use and communication. The only words in his English coaching dictionary containing more than two syllables are “spaghetti”, “confidence”, “nappyrash”, “constipation” and “Manchester”.

The pamphlet is said to be in high demand amongst his counterparts. Early reports reveal that Christian Gross, Ruud Gullit and Ossie Ardiles have camped outside the FA’s headquarters at Wembley in order to obtain the first photocopied editions. FA administrative impresario Sir Trevor Brooking has banned Roberto Martinez, Carlo Ancelotti and Avram Grant from obtaining copies, hoping that it will prevent an influx of foreign coaches ruining the homegrown managerial credentials that the FA have worked hard to build up over the past ten years.

This article constitutes satire. Despite the use of real footballers and managers, the events discussed within the article are humorously fictional, and should not be taken deadly seriously.

From Soccerlens.com - Football News

Wales v England
Euro 2012 Qualifiers
Millennium Stadium
Saturday 26 March 2011

Saturday afternoon sees Cardiff’s Millennium Stadium play host to one of the biggest international football rivalries around in a 2012 European Championships Qualifier. England cross the border in search of three points that would not only put them top of Group G (for two hours at least), but cement their rivals place at the foot of the table. International matches are notoriously tough to figure out from a football betting perspective, especially when England are involved, but hopefully this article will give you the vital clues as to where your money should be going on Saturday.

As mentioned, Wales find themselves bottom of the Group after defeats in their opening three matches. Their last game was a 3-0 defeat to the Republic of Ireland in the Nations Cup and before that a 4-1 hammering in Switzerland. They have in fact won just three of their last nine home games and dare I say it, the opposition wasn’t exactly Brazil, Spain and Argentina it was actually Estonia, Luxembourg and erm…..Scotland! It is often said that in derby games form goes out the window and Wales, rejuvenated by the return of Aaron Ramsey, will certainly be hoping this is the case here.

As usual with England, they haven’t come into this one quietly, the saga surrounding the captain’s armband has once again had people calling for Fabio Capello’s head and the threat of unrest in the camp is a concern for everyone who will be wearing the Three Lions on Saturday. So far they have two wins and one draw in their Group games and beat Denmark in a friendly last time out. Before that they were soundly beaten 2-1 at home to a new look France side. We don’t talk about what happened in the summer so we’ll skip that bit.

It must be said England were impressive in their 2010 World Cup Qualifying campaign, winning four out of their five away games and finishing comprehensive Group winners. They will be without Rio Ferdinand, Steven Gerrard and Theo Walcott in Wales but the return of Andy Carroll to the squad means the chance of a very promising partnership with Wayne Rooney up front. Whether they will start together is a different matter.

Just How Bad Are Wales?

According to Castrol EDGE Performance data, Wales have managed to score with just  3.6% of their shots in the UEFA EURO 2012 qualifiers so far, a figure superior to only four other sides and well below the 13% average in the competition.

Wales’ total of just one goal scored in the competition so far (courtesy of winger Gareth Bale)  so far is also better than only three sides – San Marino, Luxembourg and Kazakhstan – the only sides yet to open their account on the road to Poland and Ukraine. Wales’ only goal came in their 4-1 defeat away to Switzerland, and they remain pointless after their opening three games. Indeed, so far, in their combined total of 408 minutes of action in the UEFA EURO 2012™ qualifiers, Wales’ strikers have mustered just six shots on target between them. With no goals to their names so far, the Welsh forward line will need find their shooting boots if they are to trouble Fabio Capello’s Three Lions.

Worst Conversion Rate’s In the UEFA EURO 2012 Qualifiers

Welsh Strikers In the UEFA EURO 2012™ Qualifiers

Wales v England Betting

From a betting point of view it is difficult to see past an England win, but as we all know, they don’t do things easily and the 1.43 (Betfair) currently available won’t be winning any prizes for the best value of the day. The draw is available at 4.7 and a Welsh victory 8.6.

With Craig Bellamy in the Wales side, I wouldn’t be surprised if they got on the score sheet and the 2.28 available for both teams to score is not a bad bet. I do think England will win but Wales will make it tough and the pressure may just tell on Capello’s men so I will go for a 2-1 England victory at 9.8 (Betfair).

Remember, Soccerlens is offering one lucky punter the chance to win £100 – simply by placing a bet through us!

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From Soccerlens.com - Football News

The nation mourned when Emile Heskey retired from international football last year, and rightly so -for England knew that what stretched out before them was what adulterous husbands tend to refer to as a ‘transitional period’ when the kids finally ask why Mummy hasn’t been home in nearly three weeks.

Forgive me. I ramble, for it still hurts.

The sporting sorrow that engulfed the land was tangible. As a footballing entity, we were left to repatriate our faith.

It was time to choose a new hero, but decide we could not – there were no more Heskey’s left to pick up and carry the outbound original’s weighty mantle.

The obvious candidate was one Wayne Rooney, though he was quickly found out as being the sweaty pink hod-carrier that he really is.

Next came the spry figure of young Theo Walcott, though the spring-heeled Arsenal babe seems fated to see out his career stuck firmly in ‘excited puppy in a waxed hallway’ mode.

Since that fateful day (15th July, 2010) England have been cast adrift on an ocean of apathy, lost without a messianic saviour to root out, burden accordingly, then crush into unidentifiable vegetable matter through the chrome-plated grille of the nation’s monolithically self-important footballing garlic press.

That was until today.

Fabio Capello has lauded Wilshere as England's new saviour

Step forward, 19-year-old Jack Wilshere, who, according to manager Fabio Capello, is to be groomed (starting with England’s friendly against Denmark on February 9th) into the national side’s ‘Claude Makelele’ – only better.

Capello told the Daily Telegraph:

“Wilshere will be one of the new players [to play against Denmark). I’ve monitored him for five months and he has improved a lot.

I want to try to put him in this position in front of the defence. He is mature enough to play this role.

Wilshere is better technically than Makelele, though Makelele was faster. When he receives the ball, Wilshere is more dangerous than Makelele.”

Capello continued, making damn sure that he slung the dreaded ‘F’ word around Wilshere’s adolescent neck like some kind of albatross-feather yoke:

“Wilshere is the best new young player and playing all the time with Arsenal.

If you play with Arsenal, you are a really good player. Wenger likes the good player.

It is important for Wilshere to understand that he will be the future.”

Got that? Wilshere is a slower-though-several-times-better-despite-being-nearly-two-decades-younger player than Makelele (y’know, of the ‘Makelele role’ fame?) ever was and ever will be.

And,  just for the record, he’s also the best young player out there.

Roll on 2012.

From Soccerlens.com - Football News